Learn Hardcore Russian: Что бы ни происходило на работе, я стараюсь оставлять эту тревогу на работе, а дома отдыхать. - No matter what happens at work, I try to leave that anxiety at work and rest at home.

Что бы ни происходило = no matter what happens / whatever happens
This is a concessive construction: что + бы + ни + verb.
Чтобы (one word) usually means in order to / so that, or introduces a subordinate clause of purpose or wish:
- Я приехал, чтобы поговорить. – I came in order to talk.

In our sentence, we don’t have a purpose; we have “whatever happens at work”, so we must use что бы ни происходило, not чтобы.

A useful pattern:

Что бы ни + past tense verb (imperfective) = no matter what / however much …

What does ни do in что бы ни происходило? Is it a negation like не?

Here ни is not regular negation. In this construction it has a concessive / emphatic function:

что бы ни происходило ≈ no matter what happens, whatever happens

This ни appears in similar patterns:

кто бы ни пришёл – whoever comes
где бы ты ни был – wherever you are
что бы он ни говорил – whatever he says

So:

не = not (ordinary negation: я не знаю – I don’t know)
ни in these patterns = part of an idiomatic structure meaning “no matter / whatever / whoever / wherever”.

Why is происходило in the past tense when the meaning is general (like “whatever happens”)?

Russian often uses past tense in this concessive pattern что бы ни + past tense even when the meaning is general or about the present/future.

что бы ни происходило – literally “whatever would happen / whatever happened”, but functionally = whatever happens.

This is just how the structure is formed:

Что бы ни случилось, … – Whatever happens, …
Что бы ни произошло, … – Whatever happens / whatever may happen, …

The verb is:

past tense,
usually imperfective,
agrees with что (neuter singular), so происходило is neuter singular past.

Why is происходило neuter singular? What is it agreeing with?

It agrees with что:

что is a neuter singular pronoun (“what”), so any past-tense verb referring to it must be neuter singular:
- что случилось? – what happened?
- что произошло? – what happened?
- что бы ни происходило – whatever happens / happened.

So происходило (neuter singular) matches the grammatical gender and number of что.

Why is it стараюсь оставлять, not стараюсь оставить? What’s the aspect difference here?

Стараться is followed by an infinitive. Both aspects are possible, but they have different nuances:

стараюсь оставлять (imperfective) – I try as a general habit to leave this anxiety at work; a repeated, ongoing effort, a strategy.
стараюсь оставить (perfective) – I’m trying this time / in a specific situation to leave it; focus on achieving a single result.

In this sentence we’re describing a general rule / habit, so имperfective (оставлять) is the natural choice.

Why is эту тревогу in this form and not эта тревога?

Эта тревога is the nominative form (“this anxiety” as the subject):

Эта тревога мешает мне. – This anxiety is bothering me.

In the sentence, тревогу is the direct object of оставлять:

оставлять (что?) тревогу – to leave (what?) anxiety.

So we need the accusative singular feminine:

nominative: эта тревога
accusative: эту тревогу

That’s why we have оставлять эту тревогу.

Why is а used before дома отдыхать, and not и?

Both а and и can connect clauses, but:

и = and (simple addition, same direction)
а = and/but (contrast, opposition, or a different direction)

Here we contrast work and home:

оставлять тревогу на работе, а дома отдыхать
– leave the anxiety at work, and (by contrast) at home relax.

А emphasizes the contrast between places and states:

at work → anxiety
at home → rest

Using и would sound more neutral and lose that neat contrast.

Why is the second part а дома отдыхать just an infinitive, not а дома я отдыхаю?

There is an ellipsis: we mentally repeat я стараюсь and the infinitive pattern:

Full form: … я стараюсь оставлять эту тревогу на работе, а дома (я стараюсь) отдыхать.

Because я стараюсь already appeared, Russian often omits it in the second, parallel part and just keeps the infinitive:

Я люблю читать и смотреть фильмы.
(“люблю” is not repeated before “смотреть”.)

So дома отдыхать is understood as дома (стараюсь) отдыхать. That’s why it stays in the infinitive.

What is дома exactly? Why not в доме or на доме?

Дома here is an adverb meaning “at home” (not “inside the building” in a physical sense, but “in the home environment”):

дома – at home
на работе – at work

Compare:

я дома – I am at home (state)
я в доме – I am in the house (inside a specific building, more literal location)

In this sentence, we talk about home life vs work life, so the natural choice is the adverb дома, not в доме.

What does стараюсь literally mean, and why does it end in -сь?

Стараюсь comes from стараться, a reflexive verb:

infinitive: стараться – to try, to make an effort
1st person singular: я стараюсь – I try / I make an effort

The -сь (or -ся) is a reflexive ending. With стараться, it doesn’t mean you’re doing something “to yourself”; it’s just part of how the verb is formed and always used:

you don’t say я стараю, only я стараюсь.

Functionally for learners, you can remember:

стараться + infinitive = to try to do something.

Why is на работе repeated: что бы ни происходило на работе and оставлять эту тревогу на работе? Is that necessary?

The repetition:

clarifies that:
- whatever happens at work
- the anxiety from that should stay at work,
makes the contrast work vs home very clear:
на работе ↔ дома.

Is it strictly necessary? Grammatically no, you could omit the second на работе and say:

… что бы ни происходило на работе, я стараюсь оставлять эту тревогу, а дома отдыхать.

But then эту тревогу might feel a bit less clearly tied to “work anxiety”. The original wording sounds more natural and precise.