Learn Hardcore German: Die Zahl auf der Waage ist mir zu hoch, um sie einfach zu ignorieren, aber ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst. - The number on the scale is too high for me to simply ignore it, but I remain kind to myself.

You’re not the direct object here; you’re the person who is affected or concerned by the fact. German often uses the dative for this kind of “experiencer”:

Es ist mir kalt. – I am cold. (literally: It is cold to me.)
Diese Musik ist mir zu laut. – This music is too loud for me.
Die Zahl ist mir zu hoch. – The number is too high for me.

Using mich here would be ungrammatical, because sein (to be) doesn’t take an accusative object in this way, and this structure specifically needs the dative.

What exactly does zu hoch mean, and how is it different from sehr hoch?

Both use hoch (high), but zu and sehr change the meaning:

sehr hoch = very high (a strong description, but neutral)
zu hoch = too high (it’s more than is acceptable or desirable)

So:

Die Zahl ist sehr hoch. – The number is very high. (just a fact)
Die Zahl ist mir zu hoch. – The number is too high for me. (it’s a problem / it exceeds your personal limit)

In the sentence, zu hoch expresses a limit being passed and justifies why the speaker cannot simply ignore the number.

What is the function of um sie einfach zu ignorieren, and why is um ... zu used?

Um ... zu + Infinitiv introduces a purpose clause, similar to English “(in order) to do something”.

um sie einfach zu ignorieren
= in order to simply ignore it

Structure:

um
- [object or other elements] + zu
  - [infinitive]

In this case:

sie = direct object (refers to die Zahl)
einfach = adverb (simply)
ignorieren = infinitive (to ignore)

So the part zu hoch, um sie einfach zu ignorieren literally means:

too high in order to simply ignore it
= more natural English: too high to simply ignore it

The um ... zu construction emphasizes purpose or intended action.

Why is it sie in um sie einfach zu ignorieren and not es?

Sie is used because it refers back to die Zahl, and Zahl is a feminine noun in German:

die Zahl → pronoun in accusative, feminine singular → sie

Some patterns:

die Zahl → sie
der Tisch → ihn
das Auto → es

Since in ignorieren the thing ignored is a direct object, we need the accusative feminine pronoun:

um sie zu ignorieren = in order to ignore it (the number)

Why is it auf der Waage and not auf die Waage?

The preposition auf can take dative or accusative depending on whether it’s about:

location (where?) → dative
movement/direction (where to?) → accusative

Here it describes a static location:

Die Zahl auf der Waage
= the number on the scale (where is the number? on the scale → location)

So we use dative:

die Waage (nom.) → der Waage (dat.)

Compare:

Ich stelle mich auf die Waage. – I step onto the scale. (movement: accusative)
Ich stehe auf der Waage. – I am standing on the scale. (location: dative)

Why is it ist mir zu hoch, um sie einfach zu ignorieren and not ist zu hoch für mich, um sie einfach zu ignorieren?

Both are possible, but they sound a bit different:

ist mir zu hoch
- very idiomatic, compact
- strongly focuses on your subjective feeling/limit
- common pattern with adjectives:
  etwas ist mir zu laut / zu schwer / zu teuer / zu kompliziert
ist zu hoch für mich
- grammatically correct
- slightly more neutral or objective-sounding, though still fine
- emphasizes compatibility/capacity: too high for me in a more literal sense

In everyday speech, etwas ist mir zu [Adjektiv] is very typical and sounds natural.

What does freundlich zu mir selbst mean, and why is zu used with freundlich?

freundlich zu [Dativ] means “kind/friendly to someone”.

Examples:

Sie ist immer freundlich zu ihren Nachbarn. – She is always friendly to her neighbours.
Sei freundlich zu deinem Bruder. – Be kind to your brother.

So:

freundlich zu mir selbst
= kind to myself

Here:

mir is dative (required by zu)
selbst intensifies the reflexive meaning (myself specifically)

The whole ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst can be understood as:

I continue to treat myself kindly / I stay kind to myself.

Is freundlich zu mir selbst the same as using a reflexive pronoun, like zu mir selbst sein or mich selbst?

It’s similar in meaning but not the same structure.

freundlich zu mir selbst (sein/bleiben)
- uses zu + Dativ: the normal pattern with freundlich
- focuses on attitude/behaviour towards someone
- here that “someone” just happens to be yourself

Using mich selbst would require a different verb, for example:

Ich behandle mich selbst freundlich. – I treat myself kindly.
Ich bin freundlich zu mir selbst. – I am kind to myself.

So in your sentence, zu mir selbst naturally complements freundlich; it’s not a standard “reflexive verb”, but the effect is similar: you are both the subject and the person being treated kindly.

Why is the verb bleibe and not something like bin in aber ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst?

Both sein and bleiben can work with adjectives (sein freundlich, bleiben freundlich), but they differ in nuance:

sein freundlich = to be kind (state at a point in time)
bleiben freundlich = to remain/stay kind (emphasis on continuing that state)

In this context:

aber ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst
implies: Even though the number is worrying, I continue to be kind to myself; I maintain this attitude.

So bleiben adds the idea of persistence or consistency, which fits the contrast with the first clause.

What type of word is einfach in um sie einfach zu ignorieren, and why is it placed there?

Einfach here is an adverb meaning “simply / just”.

Position:

In um ... zu infinitive clauses, adverbs normally come before zu + Verb:
- um es schnell zu machen – in order to do it quickly
- um sie bewusst zu ignorieren – in order to ignore them deliberately
- um sie einfach zu ignorieren – in order to simply ignore it

You wouldn’t normally say um sie zu einfach ignorieren; that sounds wrong.

So the pattern is:

um
- [object] + [adverbs] + zu
  - [infinitive]
    → um sie einfach zu ignorieren

Why is there a comma before aber, and how does aber affect the word order?

Aber here is a coordinating conjunction meaning “but”.

Comma:
In German, main clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction (und, oder, aber, denn) are separated by a comma:
- …, aber …
Word order:
As a coordinating conjunction, aber does not change clause word order. The second clause is a normal main clause:
- ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst
  → subject (ich) + verb (bleibe) + rest

So:

…, aber ich bleibe freundlich zu mir selbst.
= … but I remain kind to myself.