Breakdown of Ik wilde u eigenlijk niet lastigvallen, maar wilde u mij ermee helpen?
ik
I
u
you (formal)
niet
not
maar
but
Questions & Answers about Ik wilde u eigenlijk niet lastigvallen, maar wilde u mij ermee helpen?
Why is the past tense wilde used here if the speaker is asking for help right now?
This is the polite past tense (beleefdheidsimperfectum). Just like in English ("I wanted to ask...", "Did you want to help..."), using the simple past makes a present-tense request or suggestion feel softer, more hesitant, and therefore more polite. The speaker is trying not to sound demanding.
Why is the word order inverted (wilde u) in the second clause? Doesn't maar keep the normal Subject-Verb order?
You are right that maar (but) is a coordinating conjunction that doesn't trigger inversion on its own. However, the second half of this sentence is a direct question: "wilde u mij ermee helpen?" (did you want to help me with it?). Direct questions always start with the verb, which is why we see the Verb-Subject order here.
How does ermee work in this sentence, and why can't I just say met het?
In Dutch, you cannot combine a preposition like met (with) directly with the pronoun het (it). Instead, they merge into a pronominal adverb: er + met transforms into ermee (literally "therewith"). It is the standard way to say "with it".
Why is lastigvallen written as a single word at the end of the first part?