When two or more people do something to each other, French uses the same pronominal apparatus it uses for true reflexive verbs: a reflexive pronoun (se, nous, vous) plus a verb. Ils se parlent most naturally means "they talk to each other." Nous nous écrivons means "we write each other." There is no separate "each other" word the way English has — French simply re-uses the reflexive construction in a plural subject context, and lets context tell the listener whether the action is reflected back on the subjects (reflexive) or exchanged between them (reciprocal). When you need to be explicit, French has a beautiful set of expressions built on l'un l'autre — literally "the one the other" — that nail down the reciprocal reading and let you specify the preposition that goes with the verb.
This page covers the basic reciprocal construction, the l'un l'autre family of disambiguators (with all the gender and number variations), and the past-tense agreement that follows the same rules as for reflexive verbs proper.
The basic reciprocal: plural reflexive pronouns
A reciprocal sentence has a plural subject (ils, elles, nous, vous, Marie et Pierre, les enfants) and a reflexive pronoun that matches: se for third-person plural, nous for first-person plural, vous for second-person plural. The pronoun precedes the verb in declarative sentences exactly as it does for reflexive verbs.
Ils se parlent tous les jours au téléphone.
They talk to each other every day on the phone.
Elles se voient souvent au café du coin.
They see each other often at the corner café.
Nous nous écrivons depuis vingt ans.
We've been writing each other for twenty years.
Vous vous connaissez bien, alors ?
So you know each other well, do you?
The pattern is mechanical: subject + reflexive pronoun + verb. There is no preposition like English "to each other" or "with each other" to translate — the pronominal construction does that work for you.
The on-trick: when "we" is reciprocal
Spoken French very often uses on with a reciprocal sense to replace nous. The verb stays in third-person singular, but the meaning is plural: on s'aime literally "one loves oneself" but in context "we love each other."
On s'aime, c'est tout ce qui compte.
We love each other — that's all that matters.
On se connaît depuis le lycée.
We've known each other since high school.
On se voit demain ?
See each other tomorrow? (Will we meet up tomorrow?)
This is colloquial, ubiquitous, and natural. Note that even though on triggers a singular verb, the underlying meaning is plural — and any past-participle agreement matches the real plural subject. On s'est rencontrés en 2010 (with masculine plural agreement) is the most common way friends say "we met in 2010."
Common reciprocal verbs
Some verbs lean strongly toward a reciprocal reading whenever the subject is plural. Memorize this set as a baseline for everyday conversation:
| Verb | Reciprocal meaning |
|---|---|
| se parler | talk to each other |
| se voir | see each other / meet up |
| se rencontrer | meet (for the first time) |
| s'écrire | write each other |
| se téléphoner | phone each other |
| s'aimer | love each other |
| se disputer | argue (with each other) |
| se battre | fight (each other) |
| s'embrasser | kiss (each other) |
| se connaître | know each other |
| se comprendre | understand each other |
| se haïr / se détester | hate each other |
| se quitter | part / break up |
| se retrouver | meet up (somewhere agreed on) |
| se serrer la main | shake hands (with each other) |
A few of these — se rencontrer, s'embrasser, se marier, se quitter — are strongly reciprocal-only with plural subjects: there is essentially no reflexive reading available, because you cannot sensibly meet yourself or kiss yourself in the everyday sense.
Ils se sont rencontrés en 2010 dans un café à Lyon.
They met (each other) in 2010 in a café in Lyon.
Mes parents se sont mariés à l'église du village.
My parents got married at the village church.
On s'embrasse pour se dire au revoir ?
Shall we kiss (on the cheek) to say goodbye?
When ambiguity is real: the l'un l'autre family
Many pronominal verbs allow both readings with a plural subject. Ils se félicitent could mean (a) they congratulate themselves (each one congratulates himself, perhaps after winning the lottery) or (b) they congratulate each other (the winners shake hands and exchange congratulations). To force one reading or the other, French uses two different markers:
- For the reciprocal reading: l'un l'autre (or its number/gender variants).
- For the reflexive reading: eux-mêmes / elles-mêmes (or nous-mêmes, vous-mêmes for first/second person).
Les deux candidats se félicitent l'un l'autre après le débat.
The two candidates congratulate each other after the debate. (RECIPROCAL — explicitly)
Les gagnants se félicitent eux-mêmes d'avoir réussi.
The winners congratulate themselves on having succeeded. (REFLEXIVE — explicitly)
In everyday speech you can omit the disambiguator if context makes the reading clear. Add it when context doesn't.
L'un l'autre: gender and number
The expression l'un l'autre agrees in gender and number with the people involved.
| Group | Form | Example |
|---|---|---|
| 2 people, mixed gender or both masculine | l'un l'autre | Ils s'aident l'un l'autre |
| 2 people, both feminine | l'une l'autre | Elles se soutiennent l'une l'autre |
| 3+ people, mixed or all masculine | les uns les autres | Ils se félicitent les uns les autres |
| 3+ people, all feminine | les unes les autres | Les filles se taquinent les unes les autres |
Les deux sœurs se ressemblent l'une à l'autre.
The two sisters resemble each other. (Both feminine, two people: l'une l'autre — and the verb takes 'à', so 'à l'autre'.)
Les voisins s'entraident les uns les autres pendant les inondations.
The neighbors help one another during the floods.
Mes copines se racontent tout les unes aux autres.
My (female) friends tell each other everything.
When the verb takes a preposition: l'un à l'autre, l'un de l'autre, l'un avec l'autre
When the verb already requires a preposition (parler à quelqu'un, avoir besoin de quelqu'un, vivre avec quelqu'un), the preposition slots between l'un and l'autre. This is one of the most distinctive constructions in French and an important signal of grammatical fluency.
Ils parlent l'un à l'autre depuis des heures.
They've been talking to each other for hours. (parler À — IO)
Ces deux frères se moquent l'un de l'autre constamment.
These two brothers make fun of each other constantly. (se moquer DE)
Ils sont contents l'un de l'autre, ça se voit.
They're happy with each other — you can tell. (être content DE)
Les jumelles ne peuvent rien faire l'une sans l'autre.
The (female) twins can't do anything without each other. (sans)
Les enfants se disputent les uns avec les autres comme d'habitude.
The children are squabbling with one another as usual.
The preposition is whichever the verb naturally takes — French speakers don't have to think about it; they reach for the verb and the preposition comes along. Learners need to memorize verb + preposition pairs, and the l'un préposition l'autre construction is then automatic.
Past tense: agreement follows the reflexive rule
Reciprocal verbs in the passé composé (and other compound tenses) take être as auxiliary, like all pronominal verbs. The past participle agreement follows the same rule as for reflexive verbs proper: agreement with the reflexive pronoun only when that pronoun is the direct object.
For most reciprocal verbs, the pronoun is the direct object, so the participle agrees with the (plural) subject:
Ils se sont rencontrés à Paris l'été dernier.
They met (each other) in Paris last summer. (rencontrer quelqu'un — DO; agreement with masc. pl.)
Elles se sont vues hier au marché.
They saw each other yesterday at the market. (voir quelqu'un — DO; feminine plural agreement)
Marie et sa sœur se sont embrassées avant de partir.
Marie and her sister hugged each other before leaving.
But some verbs take an indirect object (with à), and for those the reflexive pronoun is the indirect object, so no agreement appears on the participle:
Ils se sont parlé pendant deux heures.
They talked to each other for two hours. (parler À quelqu'un — IO; no agreement on parlé)
Elles se sont écrit toutes les semaines.
They wrote each other every week. (écrire À quelqu'un — IO; no agreement on écrit)
Marie et Sophie se sont téléphoné dans la soirée.
Marie and Sophie phoned each other in the evening. (téléphoner À quelqu'un — IO; no agreement)
The verbs that take an indirect object — parler, écrire, téléphoner, sourire, plaire, ressembler, mentir, nuire, rendre visite — are exactly the verbs that don't trigger past participle agreement in the reciprocal construction. See Past Participle Agreement of Pronominal Verbs for the full system.
Mutuellement, réciproquement, entre eux: other markers
Beyond l'un l'autre, French has a few adverbs and prepositional phrases that emphasize the mutual nature of an action.
- mutuellement — "mutually." Slightly formal, useful in writing.
- réciproquement — "reciprocally." Even more formal, often in fixed expressions like et réciproquement "and vice versa."
- entre eux / entre elles — "among themselves / each other." Especially common with verbs like se parler, se disputer, se comprendre.
Les deux scientifiques s'admirent mutuellement, malgré leur rivalité.
The two scientists mutually admire each other, despite their rivalry.
Il l'aime, et réciproquement.
He loves her, and vice versa.
Les enfants discutent entre eux dans la cour de récréation.
The children are talking among themselves in the playground.
These adverbial markers don't replace l'un l'autre; they layer on additional emphasis or take the place of l'un l'autre in slightly more formal registers.
Source-language note: French has no "each other"
English distinguishes "themselves" (reflexive) from "each other" / "one another" (reciprocal) lexically. Both languages have the morphological space to be unambiguous, but they do it differently:
- English: they kiss themselves (reflexive) vs. they kiss each other (reciprocal).
- French: ils s'embrassent eux-mêmes (reflexive) vs. ils s'embrassent l'un l'autre (reciprocal). The bare ils s'embrassent defaults to reciprocal because of the verb's meaning.
The key insight for English speakers: do not try to translate "each other" with a separate French word. The reciprocal meaning is built into the pronominal construction itself. Ils se voient already says "they see each other" — adding l'un l'autre is for emphasis or disambiguation, not for translating the English phrase.
A second insight: many French pronominal verbs map naturally onto English non-reflexive verbs. Se rencontrer = "meet" (no "self" or "each other" in English). Se quitter = "part / break up." Se marier = "get married." So even when the French construction looks heavy with reflexive pronouns, the natural English translation often has none.
Common Mistakes
Mistake 1: Translating "each other" with eux-mêmes (which means "themselves").
❌ Ils se parlent eux-mêmes tous les jours.
Wrong: this means 'they talk to themselves' (reflexive). For 'each other' use l'un à l'autre or omit any disambiguator.
✅ Ils se parlent tous les jours.
They talk to each other every day. (Default reciprocal reading from context.)
Mistake 2: Adding a translation of "to" or "with" with verbs that already imply it.
❌ Ils se parlent à l'un à l'autre.
Wrong: parler already takes à. With reciprocals you don't double the preposition.
✅ Ils se parlent l'un à l'autre.
They speak to each other. (à goes inside l'un l'autre, not in front of it.)
Mistake 3: Failing to inflect l'un l'autre for gender or number.
❌ Les filles se soutiennent l'un l'autre.
Wrong: with two feminine subjects, use l'une l'autre. With three or more, use les unes les autres.
✅ Les filles se soutiennent les unes les autres.
The girls support one another.
Mistake 4: Wrong past participle agreement for verbs that take an indirect object.
❌ Elles se sont parlées au téléphone.
Wrong: parler takes à (parler à quelqu'un), so 'se' is indirect — no agreement on parlé.
✅ Elles se sont parlé au téléphone.
They spoke to each other on the phone.
Mistake 5: Treating on s'aime or on s'est rencontrés as a singular agreement.
❌ Marie et moi, on s'est rencontré en 2010.
Stylistically off: with on meaning 'we' (plural), the past participle agrees with the real plural subject. 'On s'est rencontrés' (or rencontrées if both feminine).
✅ Marie et moi, on s'est rencontrés en 2010.
Marie and I met in 2010.
Key takeaways
- A plural subject + reflexive pronoun + verb is the standard reciprocal construction in French. There is no separate "each other" word.
- The same pronouns (nous, vous, se) do double duty for reflexive and reciprocal meanings; context picks one or the other.
- For ambiguity, use l'un l'autre (and its number/gender variants) for reciprocal, eux-mêmes for reflexive.
- Verbs with prepositions slide the preposition between the two halves: l'un à l'autre, l'un de l'autre, l'un avec l'autre, l'un sans l'autre.
- Past tense uses être and follows the same agreement rule as reflexives proper: agreement only when the reflexive pronoun is a direct object. Verbs taking à (parler, écrire, téléphoner...) do not trigger agreement.
- Mutuellement, réciproquement, and entre eux layer extra emphasis when needed.
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- Verbes Pronominaux: OverviewA2 — French pronominal (reflexive) verbs use a pronoun matching the subject — me, te, se, nous, vous, se. They cover four functions: true reflexive, reciprocal, intrinsic, and passive. All pronominal verbs use être in compound tenses.
- Distinguer Réfléchi et RéciproqueB1 — With plural subjects, *ils se regardent* could mean 'they look at themselves' or 'they look at each other.' French uses *eux-mêmes* to force the reflexive reading and *l'un l'autre* (with prepositions tucked inside) for the reciprocal. Many verbs decide for themselves.
- L'Accord du Participe Passé des Verbes PronominauxB1 — Pronominal verbs use *être* in compound tenses but follow a different agreement rule than other *être* verbs: the past participle agrees with the reflexive pronoun *only when that pronoun is the direct object*. Body-part constructions and verbs taking *à quelqu'un* are the trap.
- Verbes Essentiellement PronominauxA2 — Some French verbs always carry a reflexive pronoun even when there is no reflexive meaning at all — *se souvenir*, *se moquer*, *s'évanouir*, *se taire*. The 'se' is part of the verb's lexical entry. A second category of verbs has both pronominal and non-pronominal forms with completely different meanings.
- Se as Direct vs Indirect Object: Why Past-Participle Agreement Sometimes DisappearsB1 — The reflexive pronoun se can be a direct object (elle s'est lavée — agreement) or an indirect object (elle s'est parlé — no agreement). Knowing which it is means asking what preposition the underlying verb takes.