ponašati se / držati se (to behave) | Croatian Grammar

Ponašati se ("to behave, to act") is the everyday verb for how someone conducts themselves — calmly, rudely, like a child. Its sibling on this page, držati se, has a "conduct oneself / hold up / stick to" reading that overlaps with it but governs cases differently. The thing that trips English speakers up is that "behave" in Croatian almost never takes an object the way English "behave yourself" suggests: instead it takes a manner adverb (ponašati se čudno) or a prepositional phrase prema + dative for who you behave toward (ponašati se lijepo prema njima). This page covers the behave/conduct sense only; for the physical "hold/keep" paradigm of držati (and the full reflexive držati se), see držati.

Aspect

Verb	Aspect	Present 1sg	Typical use
ponašati se	imperfective	ponašam se	how one behaves (the standing manner)
ponijeti se	perfective	ponesem se	how one behaved on one occasion
držati se	imperfective	držim se	conduct oneself / stick to / hold up

Ponašati se is the workhorse and is overwhelmingly imperfective — behaviour is a manner, a state, so it is naturally imperfective. The perfective ponijeti se ("to behave/comport oneself on a single occasion") exists and is good Croatian, but it is much rarer and slightly elevated: Ponio se kao pravi gospodin ("He conducted himself like a true gentleman"). For everyday "he's behaving badly", reach for the imperfective.

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Don't confuse the perfective ponijeti se (behave) with the homophonous ponijeti (to carry/take along). They share a present (ponesem) but only the reflexive se form means "behave".

Present tense

Ponašati se is a regular a-class verb (ponašam se); držati se is a deceptive i-class verb despite its -ati infinitive (držim se, never *držam se).

Person	ponašati se	držati se
ja	ponašam se	držim se
ti	ponašaš se	držiš se
on/ona/ono	ponaša se	drži se
mi	ponašamo se	držimo se
vi	ponašate se	držite se
oni/one/ona	ponašaju se	drže se

Zašto se danas ponašaš tako čudno?

Why are you behaving so strangely today? — 'ponašati se' + manner adverb 'čudno'.

Držim se plana, ne želim improvizirati.

I'm sticking to the plan, I don't want to improvise. — 'držati se' + genitive 'plana'.

The l-participle

Ponašati se builds on the stem ponaša-: masculine ponašao se, feminine ponašala se. Držati se: masculine držao se, feminine držala se.

Gender / number	ponašati se	držati se
masculine singular	ponašao se	držao se
feminine singular	ponašala se	držala se
neuter singular	ponašalo se	držalo se
masculine plural	ponašali se	držali se
feminine plural	ponašale se	držale se
neuter plural	ponašala se	držala se

Perfect tense (perfekt)

Clitic biti + l-participle, with se in the cluster. As always, the third person drops je before se (ponašao se, not *ponašao se je).

Person	Masculine subject	Feminine subject
ja	ponašao sam se	ponašala sam se
ti	ponašao si se	ponašala si se
on / ona	ponašao se	ponašala se
mi	ponašali smo se	ponašale smo se
vi	ponašali ste se	ponašale ste se
oni / one	ponašali su se	ponašale su se

Na sastanku se ponašala vrlo profesionalno.

She behaved very professionally at the meeting. — feminine speaker, manner adverb.

Cijelo smo se vrijeme držali dogovora.

We stuck to the agreement the whole time. — 'držati se' + genitive 'dogovora'.

Future I (futur prvi)

The infinitive ponašati keeps its -ti but drops the final -i before the clitic: ponašat ću se. Likewise držat ću se.

Person	ponašati se	držati se
ja	ponašat ću se	držat ću se
ti	ponašat ćeš se	držat ćeš se
on/ona/ono	ponašat će se	držat će se
mi	ponašat ćemo se	držat ćemo se
vi	ponašat ćete se	držat ćete se
oni/one/ona	ponašat će se	držat će se

Obećavam da ću se ubuduće ponašati pristojno.

I promise I'll behave decently from now on. — future + manner adverb 'pristojno'.

Imperative

The high-frequency forms. Ponašaj se! is the everyday "behave!", and Drži se! is the warm "hang in there!".

Person	ponašati se	držati se
ti	ponašaj se	drži se
mi	ponašajmo se	držimo se
vi	ponašajte se	držite se

Ponašaj se lijepo dok smo u gostima.

Behave nicely while we're visiting. — 'ponašaj se' + manner adverb.

Drži se, bit će sve u redu!

Hang in there, everything will be fine! — the encouragement 'Drži se!'.

Conditional I (kondicional prvi)

bih-clitics + l-participle, with se in the cluster — for hypotheticals and softened judgements.

Person	Form (masc.)
ja	ponašao bih se
ti	ponašao bi se
on/ona/ono	ponašao/ponašala/ponašalo bi se
mi	ponašali bismo se
vi	ponašali biste se
oni/one/ona	ponašali bi se

Na tvom mjestu ne bih se tako ponašao prema roditeljima.

In your place I wouldn't behave like that toward my parents.

Other forms

The noun ponašanje ("behaviour, conduct") is everywhere — pravila ponašanja ("rules of conduct"), loše ponašanje ("bad behaviour"), kodeks ponašanja ("code of conduct"). It is the standard nominalisation and worth learning alongside the verb.
Passive participle: the reflexive ponašati se has none (reflexives cannot be passivised). The bare transitive držati gives držan, but that belongs to the držati page.
Present verbal adverb: ponašajući se ("behaving"), držeći se ("keeping to") — both literary.

Takvo ponašanje na poslu jednostavno nije prihvatljivo.

Such behaviour at work is simply unacceptable. — the noun 'ponašanje'.

Key uses and government

1. ponašati se + manner adverb — "behave [how]"

The default complement is a manner adverb answering "how?": čudno (strangely), lijepo (nicely), pristojno (decently), bezobrazno (rudely), odraslo (in a grown-up way). English "behave well/badly" maps directly onto an adverb here — ponašati se dobro / loše.

Klinci se danas ponašaju nemoguće, ne znam što im je.

The kids are behaving impossibly today, I don't know what's gotten into them. — manner adverb 'nemoguće'.

2. ponašati se kao + nominative — "act like…"

To compare behaviour to someone/something, use kao + a noun in the nominative (the case of comparison): ponašati se kao dijete ("act like a child").

Prestani se ponašati kao da te se to ne tiče.

Stop acting like it's none of your business. — 'kao da' + clause.

3. ponašati se prema + dative — "treat / behave toward someone"

When you specify who you behave toward, Croatian uses prema + dative. This is the construction English renders as "treat someone (well/badly)": ponašati se lijepo prema njima = "treat them well". Note that the manner adverb and the prema-phrase combine freely. The dative-governing preposition prema is part of a broader pattern surveyed at dative with verbs and adjectives.

Ponaša se grozno prema svojim zaposlenicima.

He treats his employees terribly. — 'prema' + dative 'zaposlenicima' + manner adverb 'grozno'.

4. držati se + genitive — "stick to / keep to"

The conduct sense of držati se governs the genitive of what you adhere to: držati se pravila ("stick to the rules"), držati se teme ("keep to the topic"), držati se plana ("stick to the plan"). This genitive government is the same family as the verbs at genitive with verbs.

Molim vas, držite se teme, skrećemo s razgovora.

Please keep to the topic, we're drifting off. — 'držati se' + genitive 'teme'.

5. držati se = "hold up / cope" (idiomatic)

Absolutely (no complement), držati se means "to hold up, to cope, to bear up" — hence the encouragement Drži se! ("Hang in there!"). Dobro se drži ("She's holding up well") is the natural way to say someone is coping.

Kako se držiš nakon svega? — Držim se, polako.

How are you holding up after everything? — I'm hanging in there, slowly. — idiomatic 'držati se'.

Common Mistakes

❌ Ponašaj sebe!

Wrong reflexive — 'behave!' is 'ponašaj se' (clitic 'se'), not the full pronoun 'sebe'; and Croatian doesn't say 'behave yourself' with an object the way English does.

✅ Ponašaj se!

Behave!

❌ Ponaša se loše ponašanje.

Doubled root — you behave with a manner adverb, not by 'behaving a behaviour': just 'ponaša se loše'.

✅ Ponaša se loše.

He's behaving badly.

❌ Ponaša se loše s njima.

Wrong preposition — 'behave toward someone' is 'prema' + dative, not 's' + instrumental: 'prema njima'.

✅ Ponaša se loše prema njima.

He treats them badly.

❌ Drži se pravila u akuzativu — držim se pravilo.

Case error — 'držati se' governs the genitive ('pravila'), not the accusative 'pravilo'.

✅ Držim se pravila.

I stick to the rules.

❌ Ponašam se k njima ljubazno.

Wrong preposition — it's 'prema' (toward), not 'k/ka', for behaving toward someone.

✅ Ponašam se ljubazno prema njima.

I behave kindly toward them.

Key Takeaways

ponašati se (impf, ponašam se) is the everyday "behave/act"; the rare perfective is ponijeti se (ponesem se).
Default complement is a manner adverb — ponašati se čudno / lijepo / pristojno — not an object.
For who you behave toward, use prema + dative: ponašati se lijepo prema njima ("treat them well").
držati se + genitive = "stick to / keep to" (držati se pravila); absolutely, držati se = "hold up", hence Drži se! ("Hang in there!").
The noun ponašanje ("behaviour, conduct") is the standard nominalisation. For držati's physical hold/keep paradigm, see the dedicated page.

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