Learn Hardcore Turkish: Toplantıdayken telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar. - It’s more polite to put your phone on silent while you’re in a meeting.

Telefonunu = telefon (phone) + -un (your) + -u (object marker / accusative).
So it literally means “your phone (as a specific object)”.

In Turkish, when the object is specific/definite (your phone, that phone, my phone), it usually takes the accusative ending.

Telefonunu sessize almak = to silence your phone (a particular phone).
Without endings, telefon sessize almak sounds incomplete or unnatural here.

What exactly does sessize almak mean? Why “take to silence”?

Literally, sessize almak is “to take (something) into silent mode”. It’s the standard way to say “to silence / mute (a device)”:

Telefonunu sessize al. – Silence your phone.
Televizyonu sessize alır mısın? – Can you mute the TV?

Turkish often uses almak in this sort of “put into a state” meaning:

not al – take notes (put something into note form)
kayda almak – record (take into recording)

So sessize almak = make it go into the state “silent”.

How is Toplantıdayken built, and what does -yken / -ken do?

Toplantıdayken = toplantı (meeting) + -da (in/at) + -yken (while / when).

The suffix -ken means “while / when (something is happening)” and attaches to certain forms.
When it comes after a vowel-ending form like toplantıda, a buffer -y- is added → toplantıdayken.

So:

Toplantıdayken = “while (you are) in a meeting / when (you are) in a meeting”.
The subject “you” is understood from context; it doesn’t need to be said.

Why is it telefonunu sessize almak and not telefonunu sessize alman?

Both are valid, but they’re slightly different structures:

Telefonunu sessize almak – using the infinitive -mak to talk about the action in general.
- Literally: “to silence your phone is more polite.”
Telefonunu sessize alman – using -man, which is a nominalized (verb → noun) form meaning “your silencing your phone.”
- Literally: “your silencing your phone is more polite.”

A full “long” version would be:

Toplantıdayken telefonunu sessize alman daha kibar.

In everyday speech, Turkish often omits the possessive subject (-m, -n, -ı, -ımız, etc.) and just uses the infinitive:
Telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar.

What does daha kibar mean exactly? Where is the thing it’s being compared to?

Daha = more, kibar = polite → daha kibar = more polite.

In Turkish, the thing you’re comparing to is often left implicit:

Bu daha iyi. – This is better (than the other one we’re talking about).
Toplantıdayken telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar. – It’s more polite (than not silencing it / than leaving the sound on, etc.).

So the comparison is understood from context, not stated explicitly.

Why is it daha kibar and not daha kibardır?

Both are grammatically correct:

daha kibar – no explicit “is”; this is very common in spoken and informal written Turkish.
daha kibardır – with -dır, the full copula; sounds a bit more formal, more like a general rule or statement.

Turkish often drops the “is” in simple present statements with adjectives:

Bugün hava güzel. (instead of güzeldir)
Bu kitap ilginç. (instead of ilginçtir)

So daha kibar is the natural everyday form.

Could we move Toplantıdayken to another position in the sentence?

Yes. Word order is fairly flexible, especially for adverbial parts like Toplantıdayken. All of these are possible:

Toplantıdayken telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar. (most natural / neutral)
Telefonunu toplantıdayken sessize almak daha kibar.
Telefonunu sessize almak toplantıdayken daha kibar. (less typical, but possible in some contexts)

Putting Toplantıdayken first is the most common, because time/condition phrases often come at the beginning of the sentence in Turkish.

Why do we use -mak (sessize almak) instead of a normal finite verb like al?

Sessize almak with -mak is the infinitive, functioning like a noun: “(to) silence (the phone).”

So:

Telefonunu sessize al. – Imperative/command: “Silence your phone.”
Telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar. – Infinitive as subject: “To silence your phone is more polite.”

In Turkish, infinitives with -mak / -mek are very commonly used as the subject or object of a sentence.

Why is it telefonunu, not telefonun or telefonunuzu?

Three different forms:

telefonun = your phone (2nd person singular possessive, no case ending)
telefonunu = your phone (possessive + accusative object marker)
telefonunuzu = your phone (formal/plural your
- accusative)

In our sentence:

We need the object form because we’re doing something to it (sessize almak).
The sentence is in informal “you (singular)”, so telefonunu fits.

A more formal version addressing someone politely would be:

Toplantıdayken telefonunuzu sessize almak daha kibardır.

Could we say Toplantı sırasında instead of Toplantıdayken?

Yes, with a small nuance change:

Toplantıdayken telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar.
– While you are in a meeting / when you’re at the meeting.
Toplantı sırasında telefonunu sessize almak daha kibar.
– During the meeting, it is more polite to silence your phone.

Both are natural. -dayken sounds a bit more like “at the time when you’re in the meeting”, whereas sırasında is more like “during the course of the meeting”, but in practice they often feel almost the same here.