Learn Hardcore Norwegian: Vi snakker om forholdet vårt, og jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine ærlig. - We talk about our relationship, and I try to describe my feelings honestly.

Without om, it would sound incomplete, like “We are talking our relationship”, which is wrong in both languages. The preposition om is needed to introduce the topic you’re talking about.

Why is it forholdet vårt and not vårt forhold?

Both forholdet vårt and vårt forhold are grammatically correct and mean “our relationship”, but they differ in style and emphasis.

forholdet vårt
- Definite noun forholdet (the relationship)
- Possessive vårt placed after the noun
- Very common and neutral in spoken and written Norwegian
- Slightly more “everyday” and natural in many contexts
vårt forhold
- Possessive vårt placed before the noun
- Noun is indefinite (forhold)
- Also correct, often a bit more formal, “written” or emphatic

Here, forholdet vårt is the most natural, idiomatic choice when talking personally about “our relationship” in everyday language.

Why is forholdet in the definite form (with -et)?

forhold is a neuter noun:

et forhold = a relationship
forholdet = the relationship

In English, we say our relationship without “the”, but in Norwegian, when you use a postposed possessive (possessive after the noun, like vårt, min(e), din(e)), the noun must be in the definite form:

forholdet vårt = literally “the relationship ours” → our relationship
følelsene mine = literally “the feelings mine” → my feelings

So the -et is required because you say vårt after the noun.

Why is it følelsene mine and not mine følelser?

Again, both are grammatically correct and mean “my feelings”:

følelsene mine
- Very common in spoken Norwegian
- Noun in definite plural: følelsene (“the feelings”)
- Possessive mine placed after the noun
- Slightly more informal / natural in everyday speech
mine følelser
- Possessive mine before the noun (preposed)
- Noun is indefinite plural: følelser (“feelings”)
- Often sounds a bit more formal, written, or emphatic

In the sentence, følelsene mine matches the personal, conversational tone of forholdet vårt. It sounds like a natural way someone would talk about their own emotions.

Why do we use mine with følelsene, but vårt with forholdet?

The possessive must agree with the gender and number of the noun.

forhold is neuter, singular:
- indefinite: et forhold
- definite: forholdet
- our → vårt (neuter singular)
  → forholdet vårt
følelser is common gender, plural:
- indefinite plural: følelser
- definite plural: følelsene
- my → mine (plural)
  → følelsene mine

So:

vårt is “our” for neuter singular nouns
mine is “my” for plural nouns

Why is følelsene in the definite form here?

Because the possessive mine comes after the noun:

With a postposed possessive (noun + possessive), the noun must be definite:
- følelsene mine = the feelings mine → my feelings
- boka mi = the book my → my book
- vennene våre = the friends our → our friends
With a preposed possessive (possessive + noun), the noun is indefinite:
- mine følelser = my feelings
- min bok = my book
- våre venner = our friends

So because the sentence uses postposed possessives (forholdet vårt, følelsene mine), the nouns must be definite (-et, -ene endings).

Why is the verb just snakker and prøver and not something like “are talking / am trying”? Where is the continuous form?

Norwegian does not have a separate “-ing” or continuous tense like English. The present tense covers both:

Vi snakker
= We talk / We are talking
Jeg prøver
= I try / I am trying

Context decides whether it should be understood as a general habit or something happening right now. In this sentence, the context (“we’re talking about our relationship, I’m trying to describe…”) clearly suggests an ongoing action, so:

Vi snakker om forholdet vårt
= We are talking about our relationship
jeg prøver å beskrive
= I am trying to describe

Why is it prøver å beskrive and not something like prøver beskrive?

The normal, standard Bokmål pattern is:

prøve å + infinitive
- Jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine.
- I’m trying to describe my feelings.

The particle å is usually kept after prøve and forsøke when they mean “to try (to do something)”.

You may sometimes hear people drop å in informal spoken language (especially with modal verbs like vil, kan, skal), but here prøver å beskrive is the clear and natural standard form in writing.

What is the function of om in snakker om forholdet vårt? Why not på, av, or something else?

In Norwegian, the preposition om is used for:

talking about something:
- snakke om noe = talk about something
- tenke på noe, but diskutere noe / diskutere om etc.

So:

Vi snakker om forholdet vårt
= We are talking about our relationship.

Other prepositions would be wrong here:

snakker på forholdet vårt – incorrect
snakker av forholdet vårt – incorrect

om is the natural equivalent of English about in this context.

Why is it ærlig and not ærlige or something like an adverb ending?

In Norwegian, many adverbs look exactly like the basic adjective form. There is usually no special -ly ending like in English.

Adjective:
- Han er ærlig. = He is honest.
Adverb:
- Han snakker ærlig. = He speaks honestly.

So in:

jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine ærlig

ærlig modifies beskrive (describe) as an adverb: “describe (them) honestly”.

You don’t add -e for the adverb here. ærlige would be a plural/definite adjective form (used with nouns), not an adverb:

ærlige mennesker = honest people (adjective)
snakke ærlig = speak honestly (adverb)

Could I move ærlig to another place in the sentence, like jeg prøver ærlig å beskrive følelsene mine?

You can move ærlig, but word order affects naturalness and emphasis:

jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine ærlig
- Very natural
- Focus on how you describe your feelings: “describe my feelings honestly”.
jeg prøver ærlig å beskrive følelsene mine
- Possible, but sounds a bit more marked / formal / poetic.
- Emphasis shifts slightly to the sincerity of your attempt:
  “I truly/earnestly try to describe my feelings.”
jeg ærlig prøver å beskrive følelsene mine
- Unnatural in standard Norwegian.

The given word order is the most idiomatic and neutral.

Why is there a comma before og in …, og jeg prøver …?

The sentence has two main clauses (two full sentences) joined by og:

Vi snakker om forholdet vårt
jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine ærlig

In Norwegian, when you connect two independent main clauses with og, it’s normal to put a comma before og:

Vi snakker om forholdet vårt, og jeg prøver å beskrive følelsene mine ærlig.

If the part after og were not a full clause (for example, just another verb phrase with the same subject), you wouldn’t add a comma. But here, jeg is a new subject, so both are full clauses.

Could I say Vi prater om forholdet vårt instead of Vi snakker om forholdet vårt?

Yes.

snakke and prate both mean to talk.
prate is often slightly more informal/colloquial, similar to English chat or talk.

So:

Vi snakker om forholdet vårt
Vi prater om forholdet vårt

Both are correct; snakker is a bit more neutral, prater a bit more casual.

What exactly does forhold mean here, and is it the usual word for “relationship”?

Yes, forhold is the standard word for a romantic relationship, but it’s also more general:

et forhold can mean:
- a relationship (romantic, personal)
- a situation, condition, circumstance (often plural: forholdene)
- relations between things, people, states, etc.

In this context:

forholdet vårt clearly means our (romantic) relationship.

Other words like relasjon exist, but relasjon is more formal/technical and less commonly used for talking about your personal love life. forhold is the natural choice in everyday speech.