Learn Hardcore Greek: Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ γρήγορα τους φίλους μου, προκειμένου να μην κρατάω θυμό. - I try to forgive my friends quickly, in order not to hold on to anger.

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ…
→ να introduces what you are trying to do (to forgive).
…προκειμένου να μην κρατάω θυμό.
→ να introduces the purpose clause (what the point of the whole action is: not to hold anger).

So both να’s are needed because each one introduces a different verb phrase:

what you try to do (να συγχωρώ)
for what purpose you do it (να μην κρατάω θυμό)

Is να συγχωρώ basically the same as the English infinitive “to forgive”?

Functionally, yes, that’s how it’s used here.

Greek doesn’t really use an infinitive form the way English does. Instead, it uses να + verb (subjunctive) for many of the same purposes:

να συγχωρώ ≈ to forgive
να φάω ≈ to eat
να πάμε ≈ to go

Grammatically, it’s a subjunctive form, but in many contexts (after verbs like προσπαθώ, θέλω, etc.) you can think of να + verb as the Greek equivalent of “to + verb” in English.

Why is it συγχωρώ and not συγχωρήσω after να?

Greek has two aspects for verbs in the subjunctive:

Imperfective (continuous/habitual): να συγχωρώ
→ forgiving in general, as a habit or repeated action.
Perfective (single/complete event): να συγχωρήσω
→ forgiving once, a specific act of forgiving.

In this sentence:

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ γρήγορα τους φίλους μου…
means “I try to forgive my friends quickly as a general rule / as a habit”.

If you said:

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρήσω τον φίλο μου…
you’d mean “I’m trying to forgive my friend (this time, in this situation).”

So συγχωρώ is used because the speaker is talking about a general attitude or habit, not one single act.

Why is it γρήγορα and not γρήγορος?

Because γρήγορα is an adverb (“quickly”), and γρήγορος is an adjective (“quick / fast”).

γρήγορος φίλος = a quick/fast friend (adjective describing a noun)
συγχωρώ γρήγορα = I forgive quickly (adverb describing a verb)

In Greek, a common way to form adverbs from adjectives is:

γρήγορος → γρήγορα
εύκολος → εύκολα
καλός → καλά

Here, we are describing how you forgive (quickly), so the adverb γρήγορα is correct.

Can γρήγορα go in a different position in the sentence?

Yes, there is some flexibility, but not every position sounds natural.

The original:

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ γρήγορα τους φίλους μου… (very natural)

Also natural:

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ τους φίλους μου γρήγορα…

Much less natural / wrong-sounding:

Προσπαθώ να γρήγορα συγχωρώ τους φίλους μου (splitting να and the verb like this is generally avoided)
Γρήγορα προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ τους φίλους μου… (possible, but it now emphasizes “I quickly try…”, which is a different meaning.)

So the safest, most natural positions are:

right after the verb it modifies (συγχωρώ γρήγορα)
or at the end of that clause (συγχωρώ τους φίλους μου γρήγορα).

Why is it τους φίλους μου and not οι φίλοι μου?

Because here “my friends” are the object, not the subject.

Οι φίλοι μου με συγχωρούν.
→ Οι φίλοι μου is the subject (nominative).
Συγχωρώ τους φίλους μου.
→ τους φίλους μου is the object (accusative).

In your sentence:

να συγχωρώ γρήγορα τους φίλους μου
→ “to forgive my friends quickly” → “my friends” is the thing/person you forgive, so it must be in the accusative: τους φίλους μου, not οι φίλοι μου.

Why do we need both τους and μου in τους φίλους μου? Could we say just φίλους μου?

τους is the definite article (“the”) in the accusative plural.
μου is the possessive clitic (“my”).

Together, τους φίλους μου means “my friends” in a definite, specific sense: the friends that belong to me.

In standard modern Greek:

We almost always use the article with a possessive, especially with people:
- ο φίλος μου = my (particular) friend
- οι φίλοι μου = my friends
- τους φίλους μου = my friends (object)

Just φίλους μου is possible in special, more “poetic” or very colloquial contexts, but the normal, neutral form here is τους φίλους μου.

What exactly does προκειμένου να mean, and how is it different from για να?

προκειμένου να means “in order to / so as to” and introduces a purpose clause.

…προκειμένου να μην κρατάω θυμό.
→ “…in order not to hold on to anger.”

Compared to για να:

προκειμένου να is a bit more formal or “written”.
για να is more everyday and neutral.

You could say:

Προσπαθώ να συγχωρώ… για να μην κρατάω θυμό.

This is also correct; it just sounds slightly more casual than προκειμένου να. The meaning is essentially the same.

Why do we use μην here and not δεν? What’s the difference?

Greek has two main negative words for verbs:

δεν → used with indicative verbs (normal statements, questions)
μη / μην → used with subjunctive and imperative (after να, ας, in commands, wishes, etc.)

Examples:

Δεν συγχωρώ εύκολα. = I don’t forgive easily. (indicative → δεν)
Προσπαθώ να μην κρατάω θυμό. = I try not to hold anger. (να
- subjunctive → μην)
Μην κρατάς θυμό! = Don’t hold a grudge! (imperative → μην)

In your sentence, the verb is introduced by να (να κρατάω), so we must use μην, not δεν.

Is there a difference between μη and μην, and why is it μην here?

μη and μην are essentially the same word; the ν is often kept or dropped for phonetic/orthographic reasons.

Many modern speakers simply say and write μην almost all the time before verbs:
- να μην πας, μην ανησυχείς, μην το κάνεις.

Traditional grammar suggests some patterns (e.g. using μη before some consonants and μην before vowels, etc.), but in everyday modern Greek:

να μην κρατάω θυμό is fully standard and natural.
You would not say να μη κρατάω θυμό in standard writing here; μην is preferred.

Why is it κρατάω and not κρατώ?

Both forms exist:

κρατάω = more colloquial / everyday
κρατώ = more formal / literary or “short” form

They are just two variants of the same verb κρατάω/κρατώ = “to hold / keep”.

So:

να μην κρατάω θυμό
να μην κρατώ θυμό

Both are grammatically correct. In this fairly natural, conversational style, κρατάω is the more expected choice.

Could we say να μην κρατήσω θυμό instead of να μην κρατάω θυμό? What would change?

Yes, you can, but the meaning changes slightly because of aspect:

να μην κρατάω θυμό (imperfective)
→ not to be holding / keeping anger in general; no ongoing resentment; a general attitude or habit.
να μην κρατήσω θυμό (perfective)
→ not to hold a grudge this time, in this specific situation; a single decision or event.

In your sentence, you’re describing a general life strategy / character trait, so να μην κρατάω θυμό (imperfective) is the more natural choice.

Is κρατάω θυμό an idiomatic expression? Could we also say κρατάω κακία?

Yes, both expressions exist, with slightly different nuances:

κρατάω θυμό (σε κάποιον)
= to remain angry at someone, to keep feeling anger.
κρατάω κακία (σε κάποιον)
= to hold a grudge, to resent someone, to be spiteful toward them.

In your sentence:

…να μην κρατάω θυμό.
emphasizes not keeping anger inside.

If you said:

…να μην κρατάω κακία.

it would emphasize not being resentful / spiteful. Both are natural, just with a slightly different emotional shade.