Learn Hardcore Turkish: Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor. - My mother knows that I do not want to stay alone.

Ben yalnız kalmak istemiyorum.
= I don’t want to be alone. (a normal finite sentence)
Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
= My mother knows that I don’t want to be alone.
Here, “that I don’t want to be alone” is turned into a noun phrase so it can be the object of biliyor.

The part benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi is a nominalized clause:
“my not-wanting to stay alone” → the thing that my mother knows.

English uses “that …” for this:

My mother knows that I don’t want to be alone.

Turkish uses this -dik / -diğ + possessive pattern instead (here: -diğimi).

Why is it benim, not ben, in benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi?

Because in this structure, benim is in the genitive case (like “of me / my”), and it’s linked to the nominalized verb.

ben = I (subject form)
benim = my / of me (genitive)

The structure is:
benim (my) + yalnız kalmak istemediğim (my not-wanting-to-be-alone) + -i (object/accusative).

So benim corresponds to “my”, and istemediğim is like “not wanting” turned into a noun:

benim istemediğim = that which I do not want / my not wanting

Then we add -i at the very end to mark the whole clause as the object of biliyor.

Can I leave out benim? Is Annem, yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor also correct?

Yes, it is correct and very natural.

Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
Annem, yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.

Both mean:
My mother knows that I don’t want to be alone.

You can drop benim because istemediğimi already shows the subject “I” inside the verb ending (-im = “my / I”).

Using benim:

adds clarity, especially in longer or more complex sentences;
adds emphasis on who it is: it’s me who doesn’t want to be alone.

What exactly does yalnız kalmak mean?

Literally:

yalnız = alone
kalmak = to stay, to remain

So yalnız kalmak = to stay alone / to be left alone / to be by oneself.

It doesn’t mean “to become lonely”; it’s more about the state of being on your own, not about the emotion of loneliness.

Why do we need kalmak? Why can’t we just say yalnız istemediğimi?

Without kalmak, the meaning changes or becomes unnatural.

yalnız istemediğim → literally “what I don’t want alone” or “my not wanting alone”
(this doesn’t naturally express “I don’t want to be alone”)

To express “to be / stay alone”, Turkish commonly uses yalnız kalmak.
So you need the verb kalmak to carry the idea of “being/staying” alone.

Therefore:

yalnız kalmak istememek = to not want to be alone

How is istemediğimi formed? What are all those endings?

istemediğimi can be segmented like this:

iste- = want
-me- = negation (not)
-dik → here as -diğ- = nominalizer/participle that turns the verb into a noun-like phrase
-im = 1st person singular “my / I”
-i = accusative (object marker)

So:

iste-me-diğ-im-i
- istemediğim = that which I do not want / my not wanting
- istemediğimi = that thing I don’t want (marked as object)

The consonant change -dik → -diğ- happens because of a vowel after it (phonetic smoothing).

Why does istemediğimi have -di- in it? Is it past tense?

Here, -di- is not past tense. It’s part of the -dik / -diğ nominalizing suffix.

-diğ in istemediğim is from the suffix -dik, which:
- turns a verb into a clause used like a noun or adjective;
- is often used in “object clauses”: “that I do / that I did / that I will do”, etc.

So:

istemediğim = “that I don’t want” (in context)
The actual tense/aspect (present, past, etc.) is understood from the main verb or context.

It doesn’t mean “that I didn’t want” here; the whole sentence as a unit expresses a present-time situation:
“My mother knows (now) that I (generally/currently) don’t want to be alone.”

What is the role of the final -i in istemediğimi?

The final -i is the accusative case marker, showing that the whole clause is the direct object of biliyor.

Annem, [benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi] biliyor.
- The part in brackets is one big object.
- The -i at the very end marks that whole phrase as the thing that is known.

Think of it like:

Annem, bunu biliyor. = My mother knows this.
Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor. = My mother knows (my not wanting to be alone).

Why is there a comma after Annem?

In normal spoken or informal written Turkish, the comma is optional here. It often just marks a natural pause:

Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
Annem benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.

Both are fine. The comma does not change the grammar. It only helps readability, especially in longer sentences.

Can I change the word order? For example: Annem benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor or Annem biliyor benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi?

Yes, Turkish word order is relatively flexible, as long as:

the main verb (biliyor) stays at or near the end of the main clause;
the pieces that belong together (like the object clause) stay as a chunk.

Acceptable variants include:

Annem benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
Annem yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
Benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi annem biliyor. (emphasis on my mother as the one who knows)

Annem biliyor benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi is understandable in speech but sounds more marked or “spoken-style”; usually, we keep the whole object clause right before biliyor.

What’s the difference between bilmek and tanımak? Could I say Annem beni tanıyor instead?

They mean different things:

bilmek = to know (a fact, information, a skill, that-clause, etc.)
- Annem, benim yalnız kalmak istemediğimi biliyor.
  = My mother knows that I don’t want to be alone.
tanımak = to know (a person), to be acquainted with, to recognize
- Annem beni tanıyor.
  = My mother knows me / is familiar with me.

So in this sentence, you must use bilmek, because what is known is a fact (that you don’t want to be alone), not just a person.

How would I say the opposite: “My mother knows that I want to be alone”?

You just remove the negation -me:

Annem, yalnız kalmak istediğimi biliyor.

Breakdown:

iste-diğ-im-i (no negation)
- istediğim = that which I want / my wanting
- istediğimi = (as an object) that I want

Is there a more literal way to understand the Turkish sentence?

A very literal breakdown is:

Annem = my mother
benim = my / of me
yalnız kalmak = to stay / be alone
istemediğ-im-i = my not-wanting (it) [object]

So you can think of it as:

My mother knows my not-wanting to stay alone.

Of course, natural English is:

My mother knows that I don’t want to be alone.