Learn Hardcore Turkish: Annem akşam erken gelmemi rica etti. - My mother kindly asked me to come home early in the evening.

gel- = come
-me = verbal noun/infinitive marker (turns the verb into “coming”)
-m = 1st person singular possessive (“my” → “my coming”)
-i = accusative case (marks it as the object of the main verb) So gelmemi literally means “my coming (object).”

Why is it gelmemi and not gelmeyi?

Because the person who is supposed to come is “I,” not the subject of the main verb (mother). When the subject of the subordinate action is different, Turkish marks it with a GENITIVE + POSSESSIVE on the -mA noun: (benim) gelmem. Then, since it’s the object, you add -i: gelmemi.

Annem erken gelmeyi istedi = “My mother wanted to come early” (subject of both clauses = mother).
Annem (benim) erken gelmemi istedi/rica etti = “My mother asked that I come early.”

Why does gelmemi take the accusative -i?

Because with verbs like rica etmek, istemek, beklemek, etc., a nominalized clause used as a direct object is normally marked with the accusative. The clause gelmem is a specific, definite event being requested, so it appears as gelmemi. This -i follows 4-way vowel harmony, hence -i (not -ı/-u/-ü) after the front vowel e.

Do I need to include benim or benden to show “me”?

The subordinate subject can be shown as GENITIVE + POSSESSIVE: (benim) gelmem. The GENITIVE pronoun benim is optional unless you need emphasis or clarity:
- Annem (benim) erken gelmemi rica etti.
With request verbs, you can also name the addressee with the ablative (source) -den:
- Annem benden erken gelmemi rica etti. = “My mother asked me (from me) to come early.” Both can appear together and are perfectly normal.

Is the word order akşam erken normal? Could I say erken akşam?

Yes, akşam erken is normal here: time adverbials typically precede manner/degree within the clause. It means “early in the evening.”

Akşam erken gel- = come early in the evening/tonight.
Erken akşam is a noun phrase meaning “early evening” (as in “an early dinner”: erken akşam yemeği), not what you want before gel- here.
If you want a more explicit “in the evening,” you can also say akşamleyin.

Should I add eve to mean “come home early”?

If “come home” is intended, adding eve is clearer and very natural:

Annem bu akşam eve erken gelmemi rica etti.
Without a destination, gelmek is often understood from context (e.g., “come (home/over)”), but eve removes ambiguity.

What’s the difference between akşam and bu akşam?

Akşam can be generic (“in the evening,” habitually) or “this evening” if context makes it clear.
Bu akşam is explicit: “this evening/tonight.”
So: Annem bu akşam erken gelmemi rica etti = “My mother asked me to come early tonight.”

Could I use gitmek instead of gelmek?

It changes the perspective:

gelmek = come (toward the speaker/home/us)
gitmek = go (away from the speaker/here) If she wants you to come (home/to where she is), use gelmek. If she wants you to go somewhere early (e.g., to an appointment), then gitmek would be appropriate.

Is rica etti different from istedi or söyledi?

Yes, nuance and structure differ:

rica etmek = to request politely; more formal/polite than istemek.
istemek = to want/ask for; neutral, everyday.
söylemek = to say/tell; to convey content, not inherently a request.
emretmek = to command; strong/authoritative. All can take a nominalized clause object:
Annem erken gelmemi rica etti/istedi/söyledi (bana).
But the politeness/force changes with the verb choice.

Could I say ricada bulundu instead of rica etti?

Yes. Ricada bulunmak is a set expression meaning “to make a request,” slightly more formal.

Annem akşam erken gelmem konusunda ricada bulundu.
Or simply: Annem akşam erken gelmemi rica etti.
Both are natural; the second is more common in everyday speech.

What does etti look like morphologically? Why not “etdi”?

Past tense of etmek (“to do/make”) is spelled with consonant assimilation: etti (not “etdi”). The past suffix -DI becomes -ti after the voiceless consonant t, and the t doubles in writing: et- + -di → etti. The whole predicate rica etti functions as a compound verb: “requested.”

How would I say “She asked me not to come early”?

Negate the nominalized verb:

Base negative nominalization: gelmemek = “not to come”
1sg possessive: gelmemem = “my not coming”
Accusative object: gelmememi So: Annem akşam erken gelmememi rica etti. = “My mother asked me not to come early in the evening.”
If you want “not to be late” instead: geç kalmamamı (“my not being late”).

Can I use gelmem için here, like Annem erken gelmem için rica etti?

Not in that shape. … için means “for/so that/because of,” and it needs a main verb that takes a purpose phrase, e.g.,

Erken gelmem için bana ricada bulundu. = “She made a request to me so that I would come early.”
More simply, the complement clause as an object is the standard: Erken gelmemi rica etti.

Where does stress/emphasis go in this sentence?

In Turkish, the element right before the finite verb is often in focus. Here the finite verb is etti, and the object immediately before it is gelmemi. Within the subordinate clause, erken directly before gelmemi emphasizes “early.” To emphasize “this evening/tonight,” move or specify bu akşam; to emphasize the addressee, include benden.

Is akşam erken exactly “early in the evening,” or could it be ambiguous?

It’s typically understood as “early (arrival) in the evening.” If you want to be crystal clear you can say:

akşam erken saatlerde or akşamın erken saatlerinde = “in the early hours of the evening”
Or just use bu akşam erken when tonight is meant.

Is it okay to put both benim and benden in the same sentence?

Yes, it’s common and natural:

Annem benden benim bu akşam eve erken gelmemi rica etti. Here, benden marks who was addressed, and benim … gelmemi marks who is to perform the action in the subordinate clause. In many contexts you’ll omit one or both if context is clear.