Learn Hardcore Portuguese (Portugal): Hoje em dia tento ser mais paciente comigo próprio e com os outros. - Nowadays I try to be more patient with myself and with others.

Hoje em dia literally means “in the days of today” and corresponds to “nowadays / these days” in English.
It refers to the present period in general, not just to today as a single day.

hoje = today (just this day)
hoje em dia = nowadays, these days (a broader time frame)
atualmente = currently/at present (often a bit more formal)

So Hoje em dia tento ser… = Nowadays I try to be…, not Today I try to be….

What form is “tento”, and what does the structure “tentar + infinitive” mean?

tento is 1st person singular, present indicative of tentar (to try).

eu tento = I try
tentar + infinitive = to try to do something

So tento ser literally means “I try to be”, just like English “I try to be more patient…”.

Do I need a reflexive pronoun with “tentar” here, like “tento‑me ser”?

No. “Tentar” is not reflexive in this meaning.

Correct: Hoje em dia tento ser mais paciente… (Nowadays I try to be more patient…)
Incorrect: Hoje em dia tento‑me ser mais paciente…

You just use tentar + infinitive, without me.

Why is it “ser” and not “estar” in “tento ser mais paciente”?

Portuguese generally uses:

ser for more permanent traits or character, and
estar for temporary states or current situations.

Being patient is seen as a character trait or a general way of behaving, so ser is natural:

Quero ser mais paciente. – I want to be a more patient person (in general).

If you said estar mais paciente, it would sound more like at this moment / on this occasion I’m being more patient than usual.

Why is it “mais paciente” and not something like “mais paciência”?

Because “paciente” is an adjective describing “eu” (the speaker):

ser paciente = to be patient (as a person)
ser mais paciente = to be more patient

“paciência” is a noun (patience). You’d need a different verb with it:

ter mais paciência = to have more patience
- Hoje em dia tento ter mais paciência.

Both are possible, but “ser mais paciente” focuses on the quality of the person, while “ter mais paciência” focuses on the amount of patience you manage to have.

What does “comigo próprio” add? Could you just say “comigo”?

Yes, you can say just comigo:

…tento ser mais paciente comigo. – I try to be more patient with myself.

Adding próprio works like English “myself (in particular)” / “my very self”. It emphasises that it’s really with yourself specifically:

comigo próprio ≈ with myself (specifically / especially)

So comigo próprio is a bit stronger and more emphatic than just comigo.

Does “próprio” change if the speaker is a woman? How does agreement work?

Yes, “próprio” agrees in gender and number with the person it refers to.

Male speaker: Sou duro comigo próprio. – I’m hard on myself.
Female speaker: Sou dura comigo própria.

Other persons:

connosco próprios – with us (male/mixed group) ourselves
connosco próprias – with us (all women) ourselves
contigo próprio / contigo própria – with you yourself (male / female)

In writing where the gender isn’t specified, you’ll often just see próprio by default.

Could you also say “comigo mesmo” instead of “comigo próprio”? Is there a difference?

Yes, you can. In European Portuguese:

comigo próprio and comigo mesmo are both used as intensifiers meaning roughly “with myself (in particular)”.
próprio may sound a bit more formal or neutral.
mesmo can sound a bit more colloquial in some contexts, but the difference here is subtle.

So Hoje em dia tento ser mais paciente comigo próprio and
Hoje em dia tento ser mais paciente comigo mesmo are both fine.

Why do we use “comigo” and not “com mim” or “a mim”?

With the preposition com (with), Portuguese has special forms for the pronouns:

comigo – with me
contigo – with you (singular, informal)
consigo – with you (formal) / with him / with her (context decides)
connosco – with us
convosco – with you (plural)

So you say:

comigo, not com mim, in standard Portuguese.

“a mim” is used with other prepositions or structures (para mim, de mim, por mim), but not to replace comigo.

What exactly does “os outros” mean here, and why is it masculine plural?

os outros literally means “the others”, and here it clearly means “other people”.

Portuguese uses masculine plural as the default generic form when:

the group is mixed (men and women), or
the gender is unspecified or not important.

So os outros = other people in general.
If you were talking only about women, you could say as outras.

Could I say “Hoje em dia estou a tentar ser mais paciente…” instead of “tento ser”? What’s the difference?

Yes, that’s perfectly correct in European Portuguese.

tento ser – present simple: a general, regular effort (I try to be more patient, that’s my habit/aim).
estou a tentar ser – present progressive: focuses on the ongoing process now (I am currently in the process of trying to be more patient).

Both are natural; tento ser is a bit more compact and can sound slightly more neutral or habitual.

Is the word order “comigo próprio e com os outros” fixed, or can I say “com os outros e comigo próprio”?

You can say it either way; the grammar doesn’t change.

comigo próprio e com os outros – puts yourself first, slightly emphasising being patient with yourself.
com os outros e comigo próprio – puts other people first, which can subtly shift the emphasis.

Both orders are natural; it’s mainly a matter of what you want to highlight first.

Should there be a comma after “Hoje em dia”?

Both versions are seen:

Hoje em dia, tento ser mais paciente…
Hoje em dia tento ser mais paciente…

A comma after an initial time expression is optional in Portuguese, especially when it’s short.
With the comma, there’s a clearer pause; without it, the sentence flows more directly. Both are acceptable.