Learn Hardcore Norwegian: Det krever mye tålmodighet å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre. - It takes a lot of patience to build a good relationship between teenagers and parents.

The real subject is the infinitive clause å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre (to build a good relationship between teenagers and parents). Norwegian usually doesn’t like very long or heavy subjects at the beginning of the sentence, so it uses det at the start and moves the long subject to the end.

Compare:

Det krever mye tålmodighet å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre.
Å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre krever mye tålmodighet.

Both are correct and mean the same. The first is more neutral and typical; the second puts more emphasis on the building part.

You cannot just say *Krever mye tålmodighet å bygge … – Norwegian requires some kind of subject, hence det.

What exactly does krever mean here? Could you say tar instead?

Krever is the present tense of å kreve, which means to require, to demand, or to call for.

So Det krever mye tålmodighet … literally = It requires a lot of patience …

About tar (takes):

Det tar tid å bygge et godt forhold.
= It takes time to build a good relationship. (very natural)

But with tålmodighet, Norwegians strongly prefer krever:

Det krever mye tålmodighet. ✅ (natural)
*Det tar mye tålmodighet. ❌ (understandable but sounds wrong/foreign)

So use krever with qualities like tålmodighet, mot (courage), innsats (effort), etc., and use tar mainly with tid (time) and some other “measurable” things.

Why is it mye tålmodighet and not mange tålmodigheter?

Because tålmodighet (patience) is treated as an uncountable / mass noun in Norwegian, just like patience in English.

mye is used with uncountable nouns:
- mye vann (a lot of water)
- mye tid (a lot of time)
- mye tålmodighet (a lot of patience)
mange is used with countable nouns:
- mange bøker (many books)
- mange venner (many friends)
- mange tenåringer (many teenagers)

You don’t normally pluralize tålmodighet at all, so *tålmodigheter is not used in this sense.

What’s the difference between tålmodighet and tålmodig?

tålmodig is an adjective: patient.
- Han er tålmodig. – He is patient.
- En tålmodig lærer. – A patient teacher.
tålmodighet is a noun: patience.
- Han har mye tålmodighet. – He has a lot of patience.
- Det krever tålmodighet. – It requires patience.

Formally, -het is a common way to turn adjectives into abstract nouns, like English -ness:

tålmodig → tålmodighet (patient → patience)
mulig → mulighet (possible → possibility)

What is the role of å in å bygge? Why not for å bygge?

Å is the infinitive marker in Norwegian, like “to” before a verb in English:

å bygge = to build
å lese = to read
å forstå = to understand

In our sentence, å bygge et godt forhold … is an infinitive clause acting as the thing that requires patience.

Det krever mye tålmodighet å bygge et godt forhold …

For å means “in order to” / “so as to”, and it introduces a purpose:

Du må ha mye tålmodighet for å bygge et godt forhold.
= You must have a lot of patience in order to build a good relationship.

So:

å bygge → just the infinitive (to build).
for å bygge → expresses purpose (in order to build).

Why is it et godt forhold and not en godt forhold?

Because forhold is a neuter noun in Norwegian.

Norwegian has three genders: en (masculine), ei (feminine), et (neuter).

et forhold – a relationship / a relation (neuter)
det forholdet – the relationship (definite neuter)

The adjective god has to agree with the noun’s gender and number:

en god venn (masc.) – a good friend
ei god bok (fem.) – a good book
et godt forhold (neut.) – a good relationship
gode venner (plural) – good friends

So, et godt forhold is the correct combination: neuter article et, neuter adjective godt, neuter noun forhold.

What is the difference between godt and bra here? Could I say et bra forhold?

Both godt and bra can translate as “good”, but they behave a bit differently.

god, godt, gode is a regular adjective that clearly inflects:
- en god venn
- et godt forhold
- gode venner
bra is also an adjective, but it does not change form:
- en bra venn
- et bra forhold
- bra venner

In your sentence, both are grammatically correct:

et godt forhold – more neutral/standard, especially in writing.
et bra forhold – perfectly fine, slightly more colloquial in feel.

So yes, you can say et bra forhold, but et godt forhold is a very typical standard phrase.

Why is the preposition mellom used? Could you use blant instead?

Mellom means between, and blant means among.

In mellom tenåringer og foreldre, there are clearly two “sides” in the relationship:

teenagers
parents

For two sides, mellom … og … is the natural choice:

mellom deg og meg – between you and me
mellom lærer og elev – between teacher and student

Blant (among) is more for being part of a larger group:

blant venner – among friends
blant tenåringer – among teenagers

So in this sentence, mellom tenåringer og foreldre is the idiomatic and precise choice.
Blant tenåringer og foreldre would sound strange, because it doesn’t capture the idea of a relationship between two groups.

What exactly is tenåringer grammatically? How does its singular and plural work?

Tenåringer is the indefinite plural of tenåring (teenager).

The pattern is:

en tenåring – a teenager (singular, indefinite)
tenåringen – the teenager (singular, definite)
tenåringer – teenagers (plural, indefinite)
tenåringene – the teenagers (plural, definite)

So in the sentence, tenåringer just means “teenagers” in a general sense, without the.

What about foreldre – is that singular or plural? How does it work?

Foreldre means parents and is normally used as a plural noun.

Forms:

foreldre – parents (indefinite plural)
- mine foreldre – my parents
foreldrene – the parents (definite plural)
- foreldrene mine / mine foreldre – my parents (with “the” built in)

There is a singular en forelder (a parent), but it’s less common in everyday speech and often sounds a bit formal or written.

In the sentence:

tenåringer og foreldre = teenagers and parents (both in general, indefinite plurals).

If I want to say “doesn’t require much patience”, where do I put ikke?

Ikke normally comes after the finite verb and before the object/infinitive.

So:

Det krever ikke mye tålmodighet å bygge et godt forhold …
= It doesn’t require much patience to build a good relationship …

If you front the infinitive clause instead, you still keep verb-second (V2) and place ikke after the verb:

Å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre krever ikke mye tålmodighet.

Patterns to remember:

Det + verb + ikke + (object/infinitive)
- Det krever ikke mye tålmodighet …
[Something] + verb (2nd) + ikke + (rest)
- Å bygge et godt forhold … krever ikke mye tålmodighet.

Can I change the word order and start with Å bygge et godt forhold … instead?

Yes. Both versions are correct, just with slightly different emphasis:

Det krever mye tålmodighet å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre.
– Neutral, very natural. Focus is on the requirement.
Å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre krever mye tålmodighet.
– Grammatically fine. Puts more emphasis on the activity of building the relationship.

In version 2, the whole infinitive phrase Å bygge et godt forhold mellom tenåringer og foreldre is in the first position, and the verb krever is still in second position, which respects the Norwegian verb-second (V2) rule.