Learn Hardcore Indonesian: Kadang-kadang saya diam di grup chat supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman. - Sometimes I stay silent in the chat group so as not to hurt a friend’s feelings.

Kadang-kadang saya diam di grup chat. = Sometimes I stay quiet in the group chat.
Kadang saya diam di grup chat. = Same meaning, slightly more informal feel.

Where can I put kadang-kadang in the sentence? Does it always have to be at the beginning?

It doesn’t have to be at the beginning. Common positions:

At the beginning (very common):
- Kadang-kadang saya diam di grup chat supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman.
After the subject:
- Saya kadang-kadang diam di grup chat supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman.
Between verb and the rest (less common, but possible):
- Saya diam kadang-kadang di grup chat… (sounds a bit marked/emphatic)

Positions 1 and 2 are the most natural. 1 feels a bit more “topic-setting”, 2 slightly more neutral.

What exactly does diam mean here? Is it a verb like “to be quiet” or an adjective like “quiet”?

In saya diam, diam functions like a stative verb: “to be silent / to stay quiet / to not say anything”.

So saya diam ≈ “I am silent” or “I keep quiet”.

It’s not “I shut someone up” (that would be mendiamkan).
It can also be used as an adjective in other contexts (e.g. anak yang diam = a quiet child), but here it behaves more like the verb “be/keep silent”.

You can think of it as “I stay quiet” or “I remain silent” in this sentence.

Could I say berdiam diri or hanya diam instead of just diam? Do they feel different?

Yes, both are possible, with slight nuances:

berdiam diri = to remain/stay silent (often slightly more formal or literary)
- Kadang-kadang saya berdiam diri di grup chat…
- Feels a bit more deliberate/intentional.
hanya diam = just stay quiet / only stay silent
- Kadang-kadang saya hanya diam di grup chat…
- Emphasizes that you only stay quiet and don’t respond.

The original saya diam is simple and neutral.
All three are correct; choose based on how strong or formal you want it to sound.

Why is it di grup chat, not dalam grup chat or di chat grup?

di is the basic preposition for location (“in/at/on” depending on context).
- di grup chat = in the group chat (as a place/context).
dalam is more like “inside (the inside of)” and is used more for physical or abstract “insideness” or formal writing.
- dalam grup chat is not wrong, but for online/chat context, di grup chat sounds more natural and casual.
di chat grup is odd word order. In Indonesian, the modifier usually comes after the noun:
- grup chat = chat group
- chat grup would sound wrong in most contexts.

So di grup chat is the natural, everyday way to say “in the group chat.”

Why is group spelled grup in Indonesian?

Indonesian often adapts foreign words to its own spelling rules.

English group → Indonesian grup
English chat is commonly kept as chat in informal language.

So:

a group → sebuah grup / grup
group chat → grup chat

You’ll see native speakers write it exactly like that in casual messaging.

What does supaya mean, and how is it different from agar, biar, or untuk?

Supaya means “so that / in order to”, introducing a purpose or desired result.

In this sentence:

supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman = so that I don’t hurt my friends’ feelings.

Comparison:

supaya – neutral, common in speech and writing
agar – very similar to supaya, slightly more formal/literary
biar – more informal/colloquial
- …biar tidak melukai perasaan teman. (everyday speech)
untuk – usually “for / to (do something)”, focuses more on purpose than result, and often followed by a verb in infinitive-like use:
- Saya diam di grup chat untuk tidak melukai… → grammatically possible, but sounds less natural than supaya/agar here.

In your sentence, supaya is a very natural, standard choice.

Why do we use tidak and not jangan before melukai?

Indonesian has two common negators:

tidak – negates statements (verbs/adjectives)
- Saya tidak melukai… = I do not hurt…
jangan – negates commands / requests (imperatives)
- Jangan melukai perasaan teman. = Don’t hurt your friends’ feelings.

In your sentence, we have a statement of purpose, not a command:

…supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman.
= “…so that (I) do not hurt (their) feelings.”

If you used jangan there, it would sound like inserting a command inside the sentence, which is not the intended meaning.

What is the base word of melukai, and how does it compare with menyakiti?

Base word: luka = wound, injury (noun)
melukai = to wound / to hurt (usually quite strong)

So:

melukai perasaan = to “wound” someone’s feelings.

menyakiti comes from sakit (sick, hurt, painful):

menyakiti perasaan = to hurt someone’s feelings, also common and maybe a bit broader/less literal than melukai.

In practice:

melukai perasaan and menyakiti perasaan are both natural.
melukai carries a slight sense of “inflicting a wound,” sometimes more dramatic or formal.
menyinggung perasaan = to offend someone’s feelings (more about offending/insulting).

Why is it perasaan teman, not perasaan teman-teman saya if the meaning is “my friends’ feelings”?

Indonesian often doesn’t mark plural or possession explicitly if it’s clear from context.

teman can mean friend or friends depending on context.
perasaan teman can mean:
- a friend’s feelings
- friends’ feelings
- my friend(s)’ feelings
  depending on the wider context.

More explicit options:

perasaan teman saya = my friend’s / my friends’ feelings
perasaan teman-teman saya = definitely plural: my friends’ feelings
perasaan teman-teman (no saya) = friends’ feelings (friends in general / our friends, depending on context)

The original sentence is naturally vague in Indonesian, and learners often translate it as “my friends’ feelings” because that makes sense in context, even though saya isn’t repeated.

How do I generally show possession in phrases like perasaan teman?

Basic pattern: [thing] [owner]

perasaan teman = the feelings of (a) friend/(some) friends
rumah teman = a friend’s house / a friend’s home
buku guru = the teacher’s book / a teacher’s book

To make it “my / your / his/her” etc., you just add the pronoun after the owner:

perasaan teman saya = my friend’s / my friends’ feelings
perasaan teman kamu = your friend’s feelings
perasaan teman mereka = their friend(s)’ feelings

No apostrophes, no ’s, just word order.

Can I drop saya and just say Kadang-kadang diam di grup chat supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman?

You can drop saya in Indonesian, and people will still understand from context, especially in casual conversation:

Kadang-kadang diam di grup chat supaya tidak melukai perasaan teman.

This sounds like:

“Sometimes (I) stay quiet in the group chat so I don’t hurt my friends’ feelings.”

Indonesian is often pro‑drop (subjects can be omitted when obvious), but:

Including saya (Kadang-kadang saya diam…) is a bit clearer and still very natural.
Omitting saya is more casual and relies more on context.