Learn Icelandic: Ábyrgðin liggur hjá sjálfum mér. - The responsibility lies with me myself.

The intensifying pronoun sjálfur must always agree in case, gender, and number with the noun or pronoun it emphasizes. Because the preposition hjá requires the dative case, the pronoun for 'me' becomes mér. Therefore, sjálfur must also take its dative form to match mér.

How do we know the gender of the speaker in this sentence?

We know the speaker is male because they use sjálfum, which is the masculine dative form. A female speaker would say hjá sjálfri mér, and a non-binary speaker would use the neuter dative, hjá sjálfu mér.

Could I change the word order and say hjá mér sjálfum?

Yes, both hjá sjálfum mér and hjá mér sjálfum are grammatically correct. Putting sjálfum before the pronoun simply adds a bit more emphasis to the fact that the responsibility lies with you and absolutely no one else.

Why does the sentence use hjá for 'with' instead of með?

While með means 'with' in the sense of doing something together or using a tool, hjá is used when something is located in someone's space or domain. Metaphorically, when responsibility, blame, or a choice 'lies with' someone, Icelandic uses hjá.