Learn Hardcore Malay: Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu membuat saya berasa tenang. - The discussion at that small café makes me feel calm.

So literally: “The discussion at that small café made me feel calm.”
Subject → Verb → Object → Complement, which is a very typical Malay word order.

What does perbincangan mean, and how is it formed from the root word?

The root word is bincang, which means to discuss.

per- + bincang + -an → perbincangan

bincang – to discuss (verb)
perbincangan – discussion (noun, the act or event of discussing)

So perbincangan is a noun, not a verb. You can think of it like “discussion / a talk / a conversation (of a slightly more serious nature)”.

Is perbincangan more formal than words like sembang or borak?

Yes.

perbincangan – more formal/neutral; used in writing, news, meetings, serious or semi-serious talks.
sembang / berbual / borak – more casual, like chat, have a chat.

So Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu… sounds like a proper discussion (maybe meaningful, serious, or at least purposeful), not just random small talk.

Why is it di kafe kecil itu and not something like di kecil kafe itu? What is the correct word order?

In Malay, the usual order inside a noun phrase is:

Noun + Adjective + Demonstrative (ini/itu)

So:

kafe – café (noun)
kecil – small (adjective)
itu – that (demonstrative, like “that/the”)

Together: kafe kecil itu = that small café / the small café.

You cannot say di kecil kafe itu; adjectives almost always come after the noun, not before it.

What exactly does itu do in kafe kecil itu? Is it “that” or “the”?

itu is a demonstrative that basically means that. In practice, it often works like “that specific / that particular / the”.

kafe kecil itu → that small café (the listener is expected to know which one)
Without itu, kafe kecil could be a small café (not specific).

So itu makes the café definite and specific, similar to English “that” or sometimes “the” depending on context.

Could I move itu and say itu kafe kecil instead of kafe kecil itu?

Not in this meaning.

kafe kecil itu – normal, grammatical: that small café
itu kafe kecil – sounds ungrammatical or very odd in standard Malay in this context.

In standard Malay, ini and itu come after the noun phrase they modify (e.g. buku merah itu, rumah besar ini). Putting itu in front is not how standard noun phrases work.

What is the difference between membuat, buat, and menjadikan here? Why use membuat?

All three relate to making/causing, but they differ in formality and structure.

buat – root verb to make/do; very common in speech, often more casual.
- You wouldn’t usually say buat saya berasa tenang in careful writing; it sounds more colloquial.
membuat – standard transitive verb to make / to cause; good for written and spoken Malay.
- Perbincangan… membuat saya berasa tenang. is natural and neutral.
menjadikan – more explicitly to turn (something) into / to make (something) become.
- You’d normally follow it with a noun/adjective:
  - Perbincangan… menjadikan saya tenang. (also possible)
  - Sounds slightly more formal or “structured” than membuat.

Here membuat is chosen because it smoothly links the discussion with me feeling calm without sounding too stiff.

Why is it berasa tenang and not just rasa tenang? What is the difference between rasa and berasa?

Both rasa and berasa can mean to feel, but there are some tendencies:

rasa
- Literally taste, but also feel (emotion/physical) in everyday speech.
- More casual: Saya rasa penat. = I feel tired.
- Very common in spoken Malay.
berasa
- More clearly means to feel (emotionally/mentally).
- Sounds a bit more formal or careful than plain rasa.
- Saya berasa tenang. = I feel calm.

In many spoken contexts, people would say rasa tenang, but berasa tenang is perfectly natural and slightly more standard/written.

Is there a difference between berasa tenang, merasa tenang, and terasa tenang?

Yes, there are subtle differences:

berasa tenang – to feel calm (neutral, standard).
merasa tenang – also “to feel calm”, but merasa is often used with objects (e.g. merasa sakit, merasa makanan). In many dialects it overlaps with rasa; can sound slightly more formal.
terasa tenang – to suddenly / especially / noticeably feel calm.
- The ter- prefix often adds a sense of being affected / suddenly / strongly:
- Saya terasa tenang can imply “I (suddenly/truly) felt calm” or “It really made me feel calm”.

In the given sentence, berasa tenang focuses on the state of feeling calm, without extra nuance.

Could I say Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu menjadikan saya tenang instead? Is it correct?

Yes, it is grammatically correct:

Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu menjadikan saya tenang.

Nuance:

membuat saya berasa tenang – “made me feel calm” (mentions the feeling explicitly).
menjadikan saya tenang – “made me calm / turned me into a calm state” (slightly more formal, a bit more abstract).

Both are fine; the original sounds a bit more natural in everyday narrative description.

Is saya necessary here? Can Malay drop the subject like Spanish or Japanese?

You can drop saya if the context is very clear, but then the focus changes slightly.

Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu membuat saya berasa tenang.
- Explicit: the discussion made me feel calm.
Perbincangan di kafe kecil itu membuat berasa tenang.
- This sounds incomplete or odd in standard Malay; usually you keep the pronoun here.

Malay does sometimes omit pronouns when context is obvious, but after verbs like membuat, the object (saya, dia, etc.) is normally kept to avoid ambiguity.

How do we know the tense? Does this sentence mean past, present, or future?

Malay does not mark tense on the verb like English. membuat itself has no tense.

The sentence can mean:

Past: The discussion (we had) at that small café made me feel calm.
Present/general: The discussion at that small café (whenever we have it) makes me feel calm.

You know the time from context or from extra words like:

semalam (yesterday), tadi (earlier), akan (will), etc.

On its own, it is most naturally read as past if you’re telling a story, but grammatically it’s open.

Why is it di kafe kecil itu, not pada kafe kecil itu or dalam kafe kecil itu?

These three prepositions have different typical uses:

di – at / in (location, quite general)
- di kafe kecil itu = at that small café (location, not emphasising inside vs outside).
dalam – in / inside (emphasises being inside an interior)
- dalam kafe kecil itu = inside that small café (focus on interior space).
pada – at / on (more abstract or formal; used with time, people, concepts)
- Common with time: pada hari Isnin, pada pukul 8.
- With places, di is much more natural in everyday use.

So di kafe kecil itu is the normal way to say at that small café.

Does perbincangan have to be singular here, or could it mean multiple discussions?

Malay generally does not mark singular vs plural on nouns. perbincangan by itself can mean:

a discussion
the discussion
discussions (in a general sense), depending on context.

If you want to emphasise plurality, you could add:

beberapa perbincangan – several discussions
banyak perbincangan – many discussions

In this sentence, it is most naturally understood as one specific discussion at that café.

If I want a more casual way to say this, how might a friend say it in everyday speech?

A more casual, spoken version might be:

Borak kat kafe kecil tu buat saya rasa tenang.
- borak – to chat (very informal)
- kat – colloquial for di (at)
- tu – colloquial for itu
- rasa – feel (more colloquial than berasa)

Or slightly less slangy but still casual:

Perbualan di kafe kecil tu buat saya rasa tenang.

The original sentence is more neutral/standard, suitable for writing or careful speech.