Learn Hardcore Hungarian: Én szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni.

Hungarian verb endings show the person, so the subject pronoun is not needed for basic meaning. You include én mainly for emphasis or contrast, for example:

Én szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni, de ő nem.
I like talking with my friend, but he/she doesn’t.

So:

Without én = neutral, most common.
With én = “I (as opposed to someone else) like…”

What exactly does szeretek mean, and why this form (and not szeretem, for example)?

The verb stem is szeret = to like, to love.

In this sentence, it’s conjugated as:

én szeretek – I like / I love (indefinite conjugation, 1st person singular)

Present-tense indefinite forms of szeret:

én szeretek – I like
te szeretsz – you (sg.) like
ő szeret – he/she likes
mi szeretünk – we like
ti szerettek – you (pl.) like
ők szeretnek – they like

So why szeretek and not szeretem?

Hungarian has two main conjugations:

indefinite (used when there’s no specific direct object, or with infinitives)
definite (used when there is a specific direct object: the book, my friend, etc.)

szeretem is the definite form: I like/love it / I love him/her / I love the X.

Szeretem a barátomat. – I love my friend. (friend is direct object)

But in your sentence, szeretek is followed by an infinitive beszélgetni, not by a direct object noun. With infinitives, Hungarian uses the indefinite form:

Szeretek beszélgetni. – I like to chat.
Szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni. – I like to chat with my friend.

So szeretek is the correct form here.

Why can’t I say Szeretem a barátommal beszélgetni?

That sentence is ungrammatical in standard Hungarian.

Reasons:

szeretem is the definite form, which expects a direct object (something you “love/like” directly), e.g.:
- Szeretem a barátomat. – I love my friend.
- Szeretem ezt a könyvet. – I like this book.
beszélgetni here is not a direct object noun; it’s an infinitive verb. With infinitives, szeret takes the indefinite form:
- Szeretek beszélgetni. – I like chatting.
- Szeretek magyarul tanulni. – I like learning Hungarian.

So you must say:

Szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni. ✅
and not
Szeretem a barátommal beszélgetni. ❌

What’s the difference between beszélgetni and beszélni?

Both relate to speaking, but the nuance is different:

beszélni – to speak, to talk (more general, neutral)
- Tudok magyarul beszélni. – I can speak Hungarian.
- Szeretek vele beszélni. – I like talking with him/her.
beszélgetni – to chat, to have a (longer, more relaxed) conversation
It implies more of an informal, two-way, leisurely conversation, often about various topics.

In your sentence:

Én szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni.
This feels like I like chatting / having conversations with my friend, not just “I like speaking with my friend” in the purely functional sense.

Why does beszélgetni end in -ni?

The -ni ending is the standard infinitive marker in Hungarian, equivalent to English to (as in to speak, to chat).

beszélget – (he/she) chats
beszélgetni – to chat

Other examples:

olvas → olvasni – to read
ír → írni – to write
tanul → tanulni – to learn

So in szeretek … beszélgetni, the structure is:

finite verb: szeretek – I like
infinitive: beszélgetni – to chat

Hungarian doesn’t use a separate word like English to; the -ni suffix does that job.

Why is there an a before barátommal? In English we don’t say “the my friend.”

Good observation: a is the definite article (the), and barátom already means my friend. Yet Hungarian normally uses the article with possessed nouns:

a barátom – my friend
a könyvem – my book
a házunk – our house

So a barátommal literally feels like “with the my friend,” but in Hungarian this is the normal, correct structure. It’s just a different rule than in English.

In everyday speech, people sometimes drop the article in certain contexts, but the standard, neutral way is:

szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni
not
szeretek barátommal beszélgetni (this sounds incomplete or overly poetic/formal in most contexts).

How is barátommal built up, and what does each part mean?

barátommal can be broken down like this:

barát – friend
-om – my (1st person singular possessive suffix)
- barát
  - -om → barátom = my friend
-val / -vel – with (comitative-instrumental case ending)
which, after assimilation, becomes -mal here
- barátom
  - -val → barátommal

So:

barát-om-mal = with my friend

Meaning-wise:

barátom = my friend
barátommal = with my friend

Why is it barátommal with -mmal, not barátomval or just barátommal from -mal?

This comes from how the -val / -vel ending behaves.

The basic ending is -val or -vel = with.
- autóval – with a car / by car
- késsel – with a knife
When you add -val / -vel to a word ending in a consonant, the v often assimilates to the final consonant, and that final consonant doubles:
- kéz (hand) + -vel → kézzel – with (my) hand
- híd (bridge) + -val → híddal – with the bridge
With barátom:
- base: barátom
- add -val: barátomval (theoretical form)
- v assimilates to m → mm
- final form: barátommal

So the doubled mm is just regular consonant assimilation with -val / -vel.
You never say barátomval; barátommal is the correct form.

Can the word order be different? Are Szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni and A barátommal szeretek beszélgetni also correct?

Yes, Hungarian word order is flexible, but not random; it’s used to show focus (what is emphasized).

All of these can be correct, but they emphasize slightly different things:

(Én) szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni.
– Neutral: I like talking with my friend.
No special focus; sounds very natural.
A barátommal szeretek beszélgetni.
– Focus on a barátommal: It’s with my friend that I like to chat (rather than with others).
Implies contrast with other people.
Én szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni.
– Emphasis on én: I like talking with my friend (even if someone else doesn’t).
Szeretek beszélgetni a barátommal.
– Also natural; here the infinitive beszélgetni is a bit more central in the middle; nuance difference is subtle, and in everyday speech both orders are fine.

Generally: the focused, new, or contrastive information appears just before the finite verb. In your original sentence, there is no strong focus; it’s a simple neutral statement.

Does barát mean “friend” or “boyfriend / girlfriend”? Is there any gender in it?

barát is not gendered by itself:

barát – friend (usually male in literal gender, but can also be neutral in some contexts)
barátnő – female friend / girlfriend

With possessive:

barátom – my (male) friend / in context also my boyfriend
barátnőm – my (female) friend / my girlfriend

In everyday speech:

a barátom often means my boyfriend if a woman says it
a barátnőm often means my girlfriend

But in many neutral contexts (especially when the romantic meaning is not salient), barát just means friend. Context and intonation decide a lot here.

How would I say “I love talking with my friend” or “I like chatting with my friends” in Hungarian?

You can modify the original sentence slightly:

I love talking with my friend.
- Nagyon szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni.
  Literally: I very much like talking with my friend.
  This is the most natural way to say “I love …” in the sense of “I really like …”.
For a stronger verb:
- Imádok a barátommal beszélgetni.
  imádni = to adore; this is closer to “I absolutely love chatting with my friend.”
I like chatting with my friends.
- Szeretek a barátaimmal beszélgetni.
  - barát – friend
  - -aim – my … (plural) → barátaim = my friends
  - -val/vel → -val → assimilation → barátaimmal = with my friends

So:

Én szeretek a barátommal beszélgetni. – I like talking with my (one) friend.
Én szeretek a barátaimmal beszélgetni. – I like talking with my friends.