Polite Advice with "Deber" and "Poder"
Direct commands can sound a bit harsh, especially when you're trying to keep the peace with a roommate. Instead, use the conditional forms of deber (should / ought to) and poder (could / to be able to) to offer friendly, polite advice.
Use deberías (you should) to give a clear recommendation, and podrías (you could) to offer a gentle suggestion or make a polite request.
| You should clean the refrigerator because it is dirty. | Deberías limpiar el refrigerador porque está sucio. |
| You could be more understanding. The washing machine makes a lot of noise. | Podrías ser más comprensivo. La lavadora hace mucho ruido. |
| Could you use the washing machine in the morning? | ¿Podrías usar la lavadora en la mañana? |
If you are giving advice to multiple people, just use the ustedes form:
| You all should respect privacy and clean the apartment. | Ustedes deberían respetar la privacidad y limpiar el departamento. |
"If I were you..."
Another great way to give advice without sounding bossy is to share what you would do in their shoes. Use the phrase yo en tu lugar (literally "I in your place") followed by a verb in the conditional tense.
| If I were you, I would negotiate the rent and be more flexible. | Yo en tu lugar, negociaría el alquiler y sería más flexible. |
| If I were you, I would propose a new cleaning routine. | Yo en tu lugar propondría una nueva rutina de limpieza. |
| In your place, I would not tolerate the mess and would organize the cleaning of the refrigerator. | Yo en tu lugar no toleraría el desorden y organizaría la limpieza del refrigerador. |
Softening Suggestions with "Sería"
Finally, you can make impersonal recommendations using sería (it would be) paired with adjectives like mejor (better) or ideal (ideal). This removes the "you" from the sentence entirely, making the advice feel even less direct!
| It would be better to negotiate the space to have more privacy. | Sería mejor negociar el espacio para tener más privacidad. |
| To live together better, it would be ideal to negotiate when to use the washing machine. | Para convivir mejor, sería ideal negociar cuándo usar la lavadora. |