Learn Hardcore Russian: Я не люблю ссориться, я люблю мириться. - I do not like to quarrel; I like to make peace.

This is a standard pattern, similar to English “I like to…” or “I like …‑ing”, but Russian only uses the infinitive (no special -ing form).

What does the -ться ending in ссориться and мириться mean?

The -ться ending marks a reflexive verb in the infinitive.

ссориться – to quarrel (with each other)
мириться – to make peace, to reconcile (with each other)

The reflexive part is -ся / -сь, and in the infinitive after -ть it appears as -ться in spelling.

Reflexive verbs often:

Describe actions people do to or with each other:
- обниматься – to hug (each other)
- целоваться – to kiss (each other)
- ссориться, мириться
Or actions reflecting back on the subject:
- учиться – to study / to learn (literally “to teach oneself”)

So ссориться and мириться emphasize a mutual relationship: people quarrel with someone and make peace with someone.

Why is it я люблю мириться, not я люблю мир?

These say very different things:

Я люблю мир. – I love peace (the abstract concept of peace, no war, harmony in the world).
Я люблю мириться. – I like making peace / I like making up after a quarrel.

мир is a noun: peace, world.
мириться is a verb: to reconcile, to make peace (with someone).

The original sentence contrasts actions: not liking to quarrel vs liking to make up, so verbs (infinitives) are used, not nouns.

Does я не люблю ссориться mean “I hate arguing,” or just “I don’t like arguing”?

Literally it’s “I don’t like to quarrel.” The emotional strength depends on context and tone:

я не люблю ссориться – neutral to mildly negative: I don’t like quarreling / I’m not a fan of arguing.
If you wanted to sound much stronger, you could say:
- Я ненавижу ссориться. – I hate arguing.

So by default, не люблю is closer to don’t like / prefer not to than to hate.

Is there a difference between не люблю ссориться and не хочу ссориться?

Yes:

Я не люблю ссориться.
- Describes a general attitude or character trait.
- I don’t like arguing (as a rule / by nature).
Я не хочу ссориться.
- Refers to this moment / this situation – a current wish.
- I don’t want to argue (right now / about this).

In many real conversations you might hear Я не хочу ссориться when someone is trying to stop or avoid a specific conflict.

How do you say “I don’t like arguing with my friends” using this pattern?

You keep the same structure не любить + infinitive, and add с кем (with whom):

Я не люблю ссориться с друзьями.
I don’t like arguing / quarreling with my friends.

Other examples:

Я не люблю ссориться с родителями. – I don’t like arguing with my parents.
Я не люблю ссориться с тобой. – I don’t like arguing with you.

The preposition с + instrumental case (e.g. с друзьями) is how you mark the person you quarrel or reconcile with.

How would I say “I like making up with people after a fight”?

You can expand the second part:

Я люблю мириться с людьми после ссоры.
- мириться с людьми – to make up with people
- после ссоры – after a quarrel / after a fight

You can also be more specific:

Я люблю мириться с друзьями после ссоры. – I like making up with my friends after a quarrel.

What’s the difference between ссориться and ругаться?

Both can involve conflict, but they have different typical uses:

ссориться
- Focuses on a quarrel / falling out in a relationship.
- Often longer-term, emotional conflict.
- Они поссорились. – They had a falling out; they’re not on good terms.
ругаться
- Literally “to scold / to swear / to shout at each other.”
- Can refer to yelling, swearing, quarrelling loudly.
- Они ругаются. – They’re arguing / shouting at each other.

In the sentence Я не люблю ссориться, я люблю мириться, ссориться fits better because it neatly opposes мириться (falling out vs reconciling).

Are there perfective forms of ссориться and мириться, and how would that change the meaning?

Yes, the perfective partners are:

ссориться → поссориться
мириться → помириться

Imperfective (ссориться, мириться) describes process, habit, repeated action:

Я не люблю ссориться. – I don’t like quarreling (in general).
Мы часто миримся. – We often make up.

Perfective (поссориться, помириться) describes a single, completed event:

Мы поссорились. – We (once) had a quarrel / We fell out.
Мы помирились. – We made up (it’s done, peace is restored).

In your original sentence, the speaker talks about general preferences, so the imperfective is the natural choice.

Why is there just a comma between the two clauses and no conjunction like а or и?

Russian often uses a comma between two short, closely related independent clauses, especially when there’s a clear contrast:

Я не люблю ссориться, я люблю мириться.

You could add a conjunction:

Я не люблю ссориться, а люблю мириться.

Adding а makes the contrast more explicit, closer to English “but”:

Я не люблю ссориться, а люблю мириться. – I don’t like quarreling, but I like making peace.

Both versions are grammatically correct; the one without а just sounds a bit more “plain” or neutral in style.

Can I reverse the order and say Я люблю мириться, я не люблю ссориться?

Yes, grammatically that’s fine:

Я люблю мириться, я не люблю ссориться.

However, the original order:

Я не люблю ссориться, я люблю мириться.

feels slightly more natural because it presents the negative trait first, then resolves it with a positive: I don’t like quarreling; I like making peace instead.

Both versions are understandable and correct; they just differ in emphasis.

How are these words stressed and pronounced?

Approximate stresses (the stressed syllable is in capitals):

Я не люблЮ ссОриться, я люблЮ мирИться.

Details:

люблЮ – stress on ю.
ссОриться – stress on О, pronounced like [sːÓ-rit-sya], with a long “ss” sound.
мирИться – stress on И in the second syllable: mi-RÍ-t'sya.

The double сс in ссориться is really pronounced as a long s sound, not like English where double letters often aren’t lengthened.

Is люблю here tied to gender, or will women say something different?

люблю is 1st person singular and does not change with gender.

Я люблю… – I like / I love …

Both a man and a woman say:

Я не люблю ссориться, я люблю мириться.

Russian verbs in the present tense don’t change form for gender, only for person and number. Gender shows up in past tense and some short-form adjectives/participles, but not here.

Can мириться also mean “to put up with something,” and does that affect this sentence?

Yes, мириться has two main uses:

мириться с кем – to make peace / reconcile with someone.
мириться с чем – to put up with something, to resign oneself to something.

In your sentence:

Я люблю мириться.

the most natural reading (especially next to ссориться) is “I like making peace / reconciling (after quarrels).”
The object (с кем) is just omitted because it’s clear from context: people usually make peace with the same people they’ve quarreled with.

It’s not understood here as “I like putting up with things”; that meaning only appears clearly if you add с чем (e.g. Я не люблю мириться с несправедливостью. – I don’t like putting up with injustice).