Learn Hardcore Finnish: Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa. - Being in a relationship is sometimes difficult.

It usually implies a more or less steady relationship, not just casual dates.
It’s closer to “being in a relationship” or “seeing someone” than to random “dating around”.
For casual dating, Finnish more often uses words like deittailu (“dating, going on dates”).

So Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa is more like “Being in a relationship is sometimes difficult” than just “Going on dates is sometimes difficult.”

Is seurustelu a verb or a noun, and how is it formed?

In this sentence, seurustelu is a noun.

The verb is seurustella = to be in a relationship (with someone), to go steady.
From the verb seurustella, you get the noun seurustelu using the -elu/-lu nominalizing ending.

So:

seurustella = to be in a relationship
seurustelu = being in a relationship / (the activity of) going steady

Grammatically, seurustelu here is in nominative singular, functioning as the subject of the sentence:
Seurustelu (subject) on (is) joskus vaikeaa (sometimes difficult).

Why is it vaikeaa and not vaikea?

Vaikeaa is the partitive singular form of the adjective vaikea (“difficult”).

In Finnish, when you say that something abstract, uncountable, or general “is” some quality, the adjective often appears in the partitive:

Seurustelu on vaikeaa.
= Being in a relationship is (in general / to some degree) difficult.
Vesi on kylmää.
= Water is cold (as a general statement).

Using partitive here makes the quality feel non‑final, general, or partial, rather than a fixed, concrete state.

So vaikeaa agrees with seurustelu in:

number: singular
case: partitive (because of this “general/abstract” predicative use)

When would you use vaikea instead of vaikeaa in a sentence like this?

Use vaikea (nominative) when you are talking about a specific instance or giving a more definite classification, rather than a general or “to some extent” quality.

Compare:

Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa.
= Being in a relationship is sometimes difficult (in general, as an experience).
Tämä seurustelu on vaikea.
= This relationship is difficult.
Here you talk about one specific relationship, and you classify it as “difficult” in a more definite way.

Same pattern with other nouns:

Elämä on joskus raskasta. (partitive)
= Life is sometimes heavy/hard (in general, experience-like).
Tämä työ on raskas. (nominative)
= This job is hard (this concrete, specific job).

What does joskus mean here? Can it also mean “once”?

Joskus can mean two related things, depending on context:

“Sometimes / at times” – repeated, occasional
- Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa.
  = Being in a relationship is sometimes difficult.
“Once, at some time (in the past or future)” – one unspecified time
- Kävin siellä joskus nuorena.
  = I went there once / at some point when I was young.

In this sentence, because the verb is in present tense and it’s a general statement, joskus clearly means “sometimes” (repeatedly, not just one occasion).

Could you say Joskus seurustelu on vaikeaa instead? Does the word order change the meaning?

Yes, you can say:

Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa.
Joskus seurustelu on vaikeaa.

The basic meaning is the same, but the focus shifts slightly:

Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa.
Neutral word order; starts with the topic “Seurustelu”.
→ “Relationships are sometimes difficult.”
Joskus seurustelu on vaikeaa.
Puts joskus first, giving more emphasis to the time aspect.
→ More like “Sometimes, relationships are difficult.”

In everyday speech, both are natural; the difference is subtle and mostly about emphasis, not about grammar correctness.

What form is on, and what verb is it from?

On is the 3rd person singular present tense of the verb olla (“to be”).

Basic forms:

olla = to be
minä olen = I am
sinä olet = you are
hän on = he/she is
se on = it is
Seurustelu on = “Being in a relationship is…”

So in this sentence, on links the subject (Seurustelu) with the predicative (vaikeaa).

Why is there no word for “a” or “the” in Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa?

Finnish does not have articles like “a/an” or “the” at all.

Whether you would translate it as “Dating is…”, “Being in a relationship is…”, or “A relationship is…” depends on context, but Finnish uses the bare noun:

Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa.
= (In general) Being in a relationship is sometimes difficult.

If you need to be more specific, Finnish uses other tools (pronouns, context, modifiers), not articles, e.g.:

Tämä seurustelu on vaikeaa.
= This relationship is difficult.

Do adjectives always have to match the noun like vaikeaa matches seurustelu?

Yes, in Finnish, adjectives generally agree with the noun in:

number: singular/plural
case: nominative, partitive, etc.

Here:

seurustelu is singular
The predicative adjective is in partitive singular → vaikeaa

More examples:

Seurustelu on helppoa.
= Being in a relationship is easy.
(helppo → helppoa, partitive singular)
Pitkä matka on raskas.
= A long journey is tiring.
Subject is a specific thing → raskas in nominative singular to match matka.

Are there other common words for “dating” or “relationship” besides seurustelu?

Yes, some common related words are:

deittailu – dating in the sense of going on dates, meeting people (often less serious).
suhde – a relationship in general (can be romantic, professional, etc.).
- rakkaussuhde – a romantic relationship.
parisuhde – a couple relationship, partnership (often more serious or long-term).

So:

Seurustelu emphasises “being together as a couple”, romantically.
Deittailu is more like “dating around”.
Parisuhde is a more neutral, sometimes more formal, word for a romantic partnership.

How do you pronounce Seurustelu on joskus vaikeaa?

Rough guide using English-like hints (not exact):

Seurustelu ≈ SEH-oo-roos-teh-loo
- seu = like “se” in “set” + a short u; it’s a diphthong [eu].
- Stress on the first syllable: SEU-rus-te-lu.
on – like English “on”, but very short and clean.
joskus ≈ YOS-koos
- j = like English y in “yes”.
- Stress on JOS.
vaikeaa ≈ VAI-keh-aa
- vai – like English “vie” (but shorter).
- keaa – “keh-ah-ah” merged; the aa is a long a sound.
- Stress on VAI.

Main stress is always on the first syllable of each word in Finnish.