Learn Hardcore Croatian: Gospođo, trebali biste se manje brinuti; vaše dijete je jako hrabro. - Ma’am, you should worry less; your child is very brave.

Informal singular: (Ti) trebaš se manje brinuti. – “You (sing.) should worry less.”
Formal / polite: (Vi) trebali biste se manje brinuti. – “You (polite) should worry less.”

Even if you’re talking to one woman, the grammar follows the plural Vi, so you get trebali biste.

Should it be trebale biste instead of trebali biste, since I’m talking to a woman?

Both are possible; they differ in gender agreement:

trebali biste – masculine plural form, very common as a neutral default.
trebale biste – feminine plural form, making it clear the addressee(s) are female.

When Vi refers politely to a single woman, many speakers say trebali biste, and some say trebale biste. Both are acceptable; trebali biste is extremely common and sounds perfectly normal.

What exactly does biste do in trebali biste se manje brinuti?

biste is the auxiliary verb (from biti – “to be”) used to form the conditional:

trebate = “you (pl/formal) need to / must”
trebali biste = “you (pl/formal) would/should (do something)”

So trebali biste se manje brinuti corresponds closely to English “you should worry less” (a polite, softer form of advice).

Why is brinuti se reflexive? Could I say just brinuti?

For the meaning “to worry (be anxious)”, Croatian normally uses the reflexive verb brinuti se:

brinuti se = “to worry”
- Ne brini se. – “Don’t worry.”

Without se, brinuti tends to mean “to care for / look after / be concerned for” someone or something, often with an object:

Roditelji brinu o djeci. – “Parents care for the children.”

In this sentence we need the meaning “to worry”, so se is required:
trebali biste se manje brinuti = “you should worry less”.

Why is se placed after trebali biste? Can its position change?

se is a clitic (unstressed short word), and Croatian clitics normally go in the second position in the clause, in a fixed order.

In trebali biste se manje brinuti:

First stressed word: trebali
Then the clitic group: biste se
Then the rest: manje brinuti

That’s why we get trebali biste se manje brinuti, not something like *trebali se biste manje brinuti.

You can change the overall word order for emphasis:

Manje biste se trebali brinuti. – “You should worry less.” (emphasis on “less”)

But the clitics (biste, se) still stay together in their usual slot.

Why is it manje brinuti and not an adjective like manji?

manje here is an adverb meaning “less”, and it modifies the verb brinuti se (“to worry”):

manje brinuti (se) = “to worry less”

Rough rule:

Use manje with verbs/adverbs:
- manje jesti – to eat less
- manje raditi – to work less
Use manji / manja / manje (adjective) with nouns:
- manji problem – a smaller problem
- manje dijete – a smaller child

Because we’re talking about how much she worries, we need the adverb manje, not an adjective.

Why is it vaše dijete and not tvoje dijete or svoje dijete?

This is about formality and point of view:

vaše dijete
- vaše agrees with polite Vi.
- We’re addressing her formally: (Vi) trebali biste se manje brinuti; vaše dijete...
tvoje dijete
- tvoje agrees with informal ti (singular “you”).
- Would match: Trebaš se manje brinuti; tvoje dijete je jako hrabro.
svoje dijete
- svoje = “one’s own” (reflexive possessive), used when the possessor is the grammatical subject.
- For example: Brinem se za svoje dijete. – “I worry about my own child.”

Here, you (Vi) are talking about her child, not your own, so vaše dijete is the natural polite form.

Why is dijete neuter, and why is the adjective hrabro also neuter?

In Croatian, the noun dijete (“child”) is grammatically neuter singular. Adjectives must match the noun’s gender and number:

malo dijete – small child
hrabro dijete – brave child

So:

vaše dijete je jako hrabro – “your child is very brave”
(hrabro is neuter singular, agreeing with dijete)

Even if the child is a boy or a girl, dijete still takes neuter agreement. To show gender clearly, you’d switch to a gendered noun:

vaš sin je jako hrabar – your son is very brave (masc.)
vaša kći je jako hrabra – your daughter is very brave (fem.)

What’s the difference between trebate se manje brinuti, trebali biste se manje brinuti, and ne brinite se toliko?

All give advice, but with different tone:

Trebate se manje brinuti.
- Present tense of trebati.
- Often stronger: “You need to / must worry less.”
Trebali biste se manje brinuti.
- Conditional form.
- Softer and more polite: “You should / you ought to worry less.”
- Fits very well with respectful Gospođo.
Ne brinite se toliko.
- Imperative (formal/plural).
- Direct: “Don’t worry so much.”

The original trebali biste se manje brinuti is a gentle, considerate suggestion.

Can I change the word order in vaše dijete je jako hrabro?

Yes; Croatian word order is flexible, though each variant has a slightly different emphasis.

All of these are grammatical:

Vaše dijete je jako hrabro. – neutral, standard.
Vaše je dijete jako hrabro. – slight focus on “your child” (not someone else’s).
Jako je hrabro vaše dijete. – strong emphasis on how brave the child is.
Dijete vaše je jako hrabro. – marked / poetic; not typical everyday word order.

In normal speech and writing, Vaše dijete je jako hrabro is the most neutral.

Why is there a semicolon between the clauses instead of a comma or a period?

The two parts are both independent clauses:

Gospođo, trebali biste se manje brinuti
vaše dijete je jako hrabro

A semicolon (;) connects them more tightly than a period and signals that the second clause explains or supports the first.

You could also write:

Gospođo, trebali biste se manje brinuti. Vaše dijete je jako hrabro. (two separate sentences)
Gospođo, trebali biste se manje brinuti, jer je vaše dijete jako hrabro. (“because” explicitly added)

So the semicolon is a stylistic punctuation choice, not a grammatical requirement.

How do you pronounce Gospođo and dijete, especially đ and ije?

Approximate pronunciations:

Gospođo – /gɔsˈpɔd͡ʑɔ/
- đ = a soft “dy” sound, like the “d” in “duke” with a y-glide (“dyuke”).
- Syllables: gos-pó-đo (stress on -spo-).
dijete – /ˈdijɛtɛ/
- dij ≈ “dee‑y”.
- ije here is pronounced as i + je, not as a single long “ee”.
- Syllables: di-je-te (stress on di-).

Very rough English-like guides:

Gospođo ≈ GOSS-po-dyo
dijete ≈ DEE-ye-te (with short “e” sounds in -je- and -te)