Learn Hardcore Malay: Ibu pengantin duduk dekat pelamin sambil memerhati semua hiasan bunga. - The bride’s/groom’s mother sits near the wedding dais while observing all the flower decorations.

Context (who is being talked about, cultural norms, etc.) tells you whether this is the bride’s mother, the groom’s mother, or just “the bride/groom’s mother” in general. There is no extra marker in the phrase itself that tells you which.

Does pengantin mean bride, groom, or something else?

Pengantin is gender‑neutral:

It can mean bride, groom, or just the person who is getting married.
To be more specific, Malays sometimes say:
- pengantin perempuan = bride (female)
- pengantin lelaki = groom (male)

In most wedding contexts, pengantin by itself is understood from context as whoever is being focused on (often the bride, the groom, or the couple together).

Why is there no word like “the” or “a” before Ibu or pelamin?

Malay does not use articles like a / an / the. Nouns stand alone, and definiteness (whether it means “a mother” or “the mother”) is understood from context.

So Ibu pengantin can be translated depending on context as:

the bride’s mother
a bride’s mother
simply bride’s mother (when you don’t need an article in English)

Similarly, pelamin can be the dais, a dais, or just pelamin, depending on how you render it in English. The Malay sentence itself doesn’t mark that difference.

How do we know this sentence is in the past, like “was sitting”, when duduk looks like a simple verb with no tense?

Malay verbs usually do not change form for tense (past, present, future). Duduk simply means sit / sits / is sitting / was sitting, depending on context.

You understand the time frame from:

time words (not present here, e.g. tadi earlier, semalam yesterday)
the surrounding story (a description of a past wedding, for instance)
sometimes from aspect markers like sedang (in the middle of doing), akan (will), sudah/dah (already)

So:

Ibu pengantin duduk dekat pelamin…
could mean:
- The bride’s mother *is sitting near the pelamin…* (present)
- The bride’s mother *was sitting near the pelamin…* (past)

Your English translation has to supply the correct tense based on the broader context.

Is duduk here more like “to sit down” or “to be sitting”?

In this kind of sentence, duduk usually focuses on the state of being seated:

Ibu pengantin duduk dekat pelamin…
≈ The bride’s mother *was sitting near the pelamin…*

Malay often uses duduk to describe a position (seated), not just the action of moving into that position. Context again decides whether you translate it as sat down (action) or was sitting (state). With sambil memerhati (“while observing”), it sounds like a continuous state: she was there, seated, looking at the decorations.

Why is it duduk dekat pelamin and not duduk di dekat pelamin?

Both are possible, but slightly different in formality and style:

duduk dekat pelamin (in the sentence)
- dekat functions as a preposition: near / close to
- very common and natural in everyday Malay
duduk di dekat pelamin
- di is a location preposition (at / in / on)
- dekat here behaves more like an adjective (near)
- slightly more formal or careful style

Spoken Malay often omits di when using dekat in this sense. In many everyday contexts, dekat + noun is understood as “near (the) X”.

What exactly is a pelamin?

Pelamin is a culturally specific word:

It refers to the decorated wedding dais or stage where the bride and groom sit during a Malay wedding.
Usually elaborately decorated with flowers, fabric, lights, and traditional motifs.
It’s a central visual feature of Malay weddings, especially in the bersanding ceremony (when the couple sits in “royal” style and is celebrated by guests).

So dekat pelamin means near the wedding dais/stage.

How does sambil work in this sentence?

Sambil links two actions done by the same subject at the same time:

Ibu pengantin (subject)
- duduk dekat pelamin (first action: sitting near the pelamin)
- sambil memerhati semua hiasan bunga (second action: while observing all the floral decorations)

So sambil ≈ while / whilst, with a nuance of doing two things simultaneously.

Pattern:

[Subject] + [Verb 1] + sambil + [Verb 2]
- Dia berjalan sambil menyanyi.
  = He/she walked while singing.

What is the difference between memerhati and everyday words like tengok or lihat?

All three relate to looking, but style and nuance differ:

memerhati
- more formal or literary
- often suggests observing carefully / watching attentively
melihat
- neutral, standard to see / to look at
tengok (or tengok‑tengok)
- very common in informal speech
- to look / to check / to have a look

In this sentence, memerhati gives a slightly more careful, observant feeling, as if she is really taking in the details of the decorations, not just casually glancing at them.

What is the difference between memerhati and memerhatikan?

Both exist, but there is a nuance:

memerhati
- to observe, to watch
- often used without extra emphasis; sounds slightly more formal
memerhatikan
- includes the suffix ‑kan, which can:
  - put more focus on the object
  - sometimes imply paying attention to something
- often translated as to notice / pay attention to / observe carefully

In many contexts, they can overlap:

Ibu pengantin memerhati semua hiasan bunga.
Ibu pengantin memerhatikan semua hiasan bunga.

Both can be understood as The bride’s mother was observing all the flower decorations, though memerhatikan slightly highlights the act of paying attention.

How is semua hiasan bunga structured, and what does it literally mean?

The phrase breaks down as:

semua = all
hiasan = decorations
bunga = flowers

In Malay, the head noun usually comes first, and modifiers follow:

hiasan bunga = flower decorations / floral decorations
- literally: decorations of flowers
Adding semua in front gives:
- semua hiasan bunga = all the flower decorations / all of the floral decorations

So the structure is:

semua (quantifier) + hiasan (head noun) + bunga (modifier)

Could we say semua bunga hiasan instead of semua hiasan bunga? Would it mean the same thing?

No, the meaning changes:

semua hiasan bunga
- head noun: hiasan (decorations)
- modifier: bunga (flower)
- = all the flower decorations / all floral decorations
semua bunga hiasan
- head noun: bunga (flowers)
- modifier: hiasan (decorative)
- = all the decorative flowers / all ornamental flowers

The original sentence is talking about decorations (made of flowers), not flowers that are decorative, so semua hiasan bunga is the correct phrase.

Where is the subject–verb–object in this sentence? What is the basic structure?

The sentence follows a clear structure:

Subject: Ibu pengantin (the bride/groom’s mother)
Verb 1 + location: duduk dekat pelamin (sat / was sitting near the pelamin)
Linking word: sambil (while)
Verb 2 + object: memerhati semua hiasan bunga (observing all the flower decorations)

So in order:

[Subject] + [Verb + place] + sambil + [Verb + object]

This is a very typical Malay pattern: main clause, then sambil clause, both sharing the same subject.