Learn Hardcore Malay: Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah apabila keadaan menjadi tegang. - I try to control my angry feelings when the situation becomes tense.

You don’t need untuk after cuba here. Saya cuba untuk mengawal… is possible, but in everyday Malay Saya cuba mengawal… is more natural and slightly simpler.

What is the base form of mengawal, and what does the meN- prefix do?

The base word is kawal, which means control / guard / regulate.

When you add the meN- prefix, you get mengawal, a verb meaning to control / to regulate / to guard.

kawal – root (often seen in compounds or imperatives)
mengawal – active verb form used in normal sentences

Example:

Pengawal = guard (person who guards)
Mengawal lalu lintas = to control traffic

Why is it mengawal perasaan marah and not just mengawal marah?

Perasaan marah literally means the feeling of anger, so mengawal perasaan marah is to control (my) feelings of anger.

You can say mengawal marah, and people will understand you, but:

mengawal perasaan marah sounds a bit more formal and emphasizes the internal emotional state.
mengawal marah sounds slightly more casual and shorter, focusing more directly on the anger itself.

So this sentence is choosing a slightly more careful, “emotional-awareness” style: controlling the feeling, not just the outward anger.

What’s the difference between perasaan marah and kemarahan?

Both relate to anger, but there is a nuance:

Perasaan marah = the feeling of being angry (more subjective, like “my anger as I feel it”)
Kemarahan = anger as a more abstract noun, like “anger” in general or “someone’s anger” as a thing

In your sentence, you could say:

Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah… (more personal, my inner feeling)
Saya cuba mengawal kemarahan saya… (literally: I try to control my anger)

Both are correct; perasaan marah is a bit more descriptive and softer-sounding.

How do I know whose anger it is? There is no saya after perasaan marah.

Malay often leaves out possessive words like saya when the owner is obvious from context.

Because the sentence starts with Saya cuba…, listeners naturally understand that perasaan marah refers to my feelings of anger.

If you want to make it explicit, you can say:

Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah saya… = I try to control my feelings of anger…

Both versions are correct; the original is just more concise.

What does apabila mean, and how is it different from bila or ketika?

Apabila means when (in the sense of “whenever / at the time that”).

Common “when” words in Malay:

apabila – when; a bit more formal/neutral, common in writing and careful speech
bila – when; more casual, very common in conversation
ketika – when; often used for “at the time when”, sometimes a bit more literary/formal

In your sentence:

Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah apabila keadaan menjadi tegang.
You could also say:
… bila keadaan menjadi tegang. (more informal)
… ketika keadaan menjadi tegang. (still correct, slightly more literary)

What does keadaan mean here, and could I use situasi instead?

Keadaan means situation / condition / state.

In this sentence, keadaan menjadi tegang is like saying the situation becomes tense.

You can use situasi (a loanword from “situation”):

… apabila situasi menjadi tegang.

Both are correct, but:

keadaan feels more native-Malay and is extremely common.
situasi sounds a little more technical or influenced by English, but it’s also widely used.

Why do we say keadaan menjadi tegang and not just keadaan tegang?

Menjadi means to become / to turn into.

keadaan tegang = a tense situation (describing a state)
keadaan menjadi tegang = the situation becomes tense (describing a change)

In your sentence, the focus is on the moment of change – when things start to get tense. That’s why menjadi is used.

You could say:

apabila keadaan tegang = when the situation is tense
apabila keadaan menjadi tegang = when the situation becomes tense (more dynamic)

What is the difference between jadi and menjadi?

Both come from the same root, but they’re used differently in standard Malay:

menjadi – formal/standard verb meaning to become / to turn into / to serve as
- Dia menjadi marah. = He/She becomes angry.
- Air menjadi sejuk. = The water becomes cold.
jadi – can mean “become” in more casual speech, but also has other meanings like “so / therefore / okay / done”.
- Jadi, apa yang kamu fikir? = So, what do you think?
- Jadi ke? = Is it happening / is it confirmed? (colloquial)

In a sentence like yours, menjadi is the standard and clear choice.

How do I know the tense here? Is it “I try”, “I am trying”, or “I tried”?

Malay verbs don’t change form for tense, so Saya cuba mengawal… can mean:

I try to control… (habitual / general)
I am trying to control… (right now / in general)
I tried to control… (past – if the context is past)

The exact tense is understood from context or from time words you add:

Tadi, saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah… = Earlier, I tried to control my anger…
Sekarang, saya cuba mengawal… = Now, I am trying to control…
Selalu, saya cuba mengawal… = I always try to control…

Can I change the word order and put apabila… at the beginning?

Yes. Malay allows either order for this type of when-clause:

Main clause first (your sentence):
- Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah apabila keadaan menjadi tegang.
“When” clause first (often with a comma):
- Apabila keadaan menjadi tegang, saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah.

Both are natural. Putting Apabila keadaan menjadi tegang at the beginning slightly emphasizes the situation and its change.

Is Saya the most natural pronoun here? What about Aku?

Saya is the polite / neutral “I”. It’s safe in almost all situations: talking to strangers, colleagues, elders, in writing, etc.

Aku is more intimate / informal, used with close friends, family of similar age, or in song lyrics, etc.

So you could say:

Saya cuba mengawal perasaan marah… (polite, neutral – good default)
Aku cuba mengawal perasaan marah… (informal, to close friends / diary style)

Grammatically both are fine; the choice is about politeness and social distance.

Is this sentence formal, casual, or neutral? How would it sound in a more casual version?

As written, it’s neutral leaning slightly formal, mainly because of:

perasaan marah (a bit descriptive/formal)
apabila (slightly more formal than bila)

A more casual version could be:

Aku cuba kawal marah bila keadaan jadi tegang.

Changes:

Aku instead of Saya (informal)
kawal instead of mengawal (dropped the prefix, common in speech)
bila instead of apabila (more colloquial)
jadi instead of menjadi (colloquial)

Your original sentence is perfect for polite conversation, writing, or general use.