To ask someone please to do something you use 〜てください. To ask them please not to do something, you use its mirror image: 〜ないでください. The whole trick is choosing the right negative te-form to build it on — and there is only one correct choice, which trips up nearly every English speaker at least once.
The pattern
Take the plain negative 〜ない form, add で, then ください: 〜ないでください = "please don't do X." The middle piece, 〜ないで, is exactly the "without doing / negative manner" te-form — a negative request is literally "please [act] without doing X."
| Verb | Plain negative | Negative request |
|---|---|---|
| 撮る (to photograph) | 撮らない | 撮らないでください |
| 吸う (to smoke, inhale) | 吸わない | 吸わないでください |
| 忘れる (to forget) | 忘れない | 忘れないでください |
| する (to do) | しない | しないでください |
ここでは写真を撮らないでください。
koko de wa shashin o toranaide kudasai
Please don't take photographs here.
すみません、ここでタバコを吸わないでください。
sumimasen, koko de tabako o suwanaide kudasai
Excuse me, please don't smoke here.
明日の会議、時間を忘れないでくださいね。
ashita no kaigi, jikan o wasurenaide kudasai ne
Don't forget the time of tomorrow's meeting, okay?
The English-speaker trap: never なくて
Japanese has two negative te-forms, and this is where they matter most. Only ないで builds requests. The other negative, なくて (the "not X, and so…" cause form), can never form a request. ×食べなくてください does not mean "please don't eat" — it isn't a request at all.
The reason is exactly the split from the negative te-forms page: なくて states a circumstance ("there being no X…"), while ないで attaches a negative manner to an action — and a request is an action you're steering. So "please don't worry" is 心配しないでください, never ×心配しなくてください.
❌ 心配しなくてください。
shinpai shinakute kudasai
Incorrect — requests are built on ないで, so なくて cannot mean 'please don't.'
✅ 心配しないでください。
shinpai shinaide kudasai
Please don't worry.
What English hides here
In English, "don't" is a single word doing two very different jobs: "Don't smoke in here" (a restriction) and "Don't cry" (a comforting plea) are grammatically identical — the difference lives only in tone. English also builds the negative imperative with no politeness baked into the verb at all; you sprinkle "please" on top and hope your voice does the rest.
Japanese does more of the work in the grammar. The request-versus-prohibition distinction is lexical: 〜ないでください asks, 〜てはいけない forbids. And politeness is graded by swapping the ending (ないで → ないでください → ないでいただけますか) rather than leaning on intonation. For an English speaker the lesson is: don't reach for one all-purpose "don't" — decide first whether you are requesting or prohibiting, then pick the ending that matches.
That said, 〜ないでください itself covers a wide emotional range. The very same form issues a polite restriction and a warm, worried plea — the difference is context, not grammar:
無理しないでくださいね。体が一番大事ですから。
muri shinaide kudasai ne. karada ga ichiban daiji desu kara
Please don't overdo it — your health matters most. (a caring plea)
芝生の中に入らないでください。
shibafu no naka ni hairanaide kudasai
Please keep off the grass. (a polite restriction on a sign)
The casual drop: 〜ないで alone
Just as ください can drop off てください to leave a casual 待って, it can drop off ないでください to leave a bare 〜ないで — a soft, intimate "don't." You hear it constantly among friends, couples, and family, and it carries real warmth, almost pleading.
お願い、行かないで。
onegai, ikanaide
Please — don't go.
泣かないで。大丈夫だよ。
nakanaide. daijōbu da yo
Don't cry. It's going to be okay.
無理しないで、ゆっくり休んでね。
muri shinaide, yukkuri yasunde ne
Don't overdo it — rest up, okay?
Because it is casual, aim bare 〜ないで only at people you're close to; toward a stranger keep the full ないでください. For the whole intimacy scale, see bare 〜て and 〜てちょうだい.
When it's a rule, not a request: 〜てはいけない
〜ないでください asks. When the point is that something is genuinely forbidden — a rule, a prohibition, "you must not" — the language switches to 〜てはいけない / 〜てはならない (and its contraction 〜ちゃだめ in speech). This is a statement of prohibition rather than a personal request, so it appears on signs, in regulations, and from an authority laying down a rule.
ここに車を止めてはいけません。
koko ni kuruma o tomete wa ikemasen
You must not park your car here.
試験中は話してはいけません。
shiken-chū wa hanashite wa ikemasen
Talking is not allowed during the exam.
The difference is real: 撮らないでください asks you not to take photos (a request you could, in principle, decline); 撮ってはいけません tells you it's prohibited. For the full treatment, see prohibition with 〜てはいけない.
Common mistakes
❌ 押さなくてください。
osanakute kudasai
Incorrect — the negative request needs ないで, not the causal なくて.
✅ 押さないでください。
osanaide kudasai
Please don't push.
❌ ドアを開けないでをください。
doa o akenaide o kudasai
Incorrect — no particle sits between ないで and ください.
✅ ドアを開けないでください。
doa o akenaide kudasai
Please don't open the door.
❌ 電車の中で電話しなくてください。
densha no naka de denwa shinakute kudasai
Incorrect — a mangled negative; the request base is しないで.
✅ 電車の中で電話しないでください。
densha no naka de denwa shinaide kudasai
Please don't make phone calls on the train.
❌ 運転するなら、お酒を飲むないでください。
unten suru nara, o-sake o nomunaide kudasai
Incorrect — ないで attaches to the negative stem (飲まない), not the dictionary form.
✅ 運転するなら、お酒を飲まないでください。
unten suru nara, o-sake o nomanaide kudasai
If you're going to drive, please don't drink alcohol.
Key takeaways
- 〜ないでください = "please don't do X," built as plain negative + で + ください.
- It always rides on ないで — the negative-manner te-form. なくて never forms a request.
- Drop ください for the intimate 〜ないで ("don't go," "don't cry"), used with people you're close to.
- For a firm prohibition ("you must not"), switch to 〜てはいけない, not a softer request.
- Politeness scales the same as the affirmative: add ね to soften, or 〜ないでいただけますか to defer.
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Start learning Japanese→Related Topics
- 〜てください: Polite Requests & InstructionsN4 — How to ask someone to do something with te-form + ください — the standard polite request and instruction — plus why it directs rather than defers, and the keigo forms that outrank it.
- Negative te-forms: なくて vs ないでN3 — Japanese has two negative te-forms — なくて marks a negative cause or state ('not X, and so…'), while ないで means 'without doing X' or forms negative requests — and they are not interchangeable.
- 〜てはいけない / 〜ちゃだめ: ProhibitionN4 — How Japanese forbids an action by topicalizing it with は and rejecting it — the mirror image of 〜てもいい permission, from stiff public signs (〜てはいけません) to a parent's 〜ちゃだめ.
- Bare 〜て and 〜てちょうだい: Casual RequestsN4 — How to make everyday casual requests by dropping ください to a bare te-form, and the softer, homey 〜てちょうだい — plus exactly where they sit on the request-politeness ladder.