Hebrew does have words corresponding to myself, yourself, himself: עצמי, עצמך, עצמו and the rest of the paradigm. But it uses them in a narrower place than English does. Many everyday reflexive actions are already encoded in a hitpa'el verb, while the עצם + possessive suffix forms fill an ordinary object or prepositional slot only where the verb leaves one open.
The complete paradigm
The base is עֶצֶם, followed by the familiar possessive endings. One linguistic curiosity hides under the same spelling: masculine עֶצֶם can mean “essence, self,” while feminine עֶצֶם means “bone.” The reflexive paradigm belongs to the “self” word.
| Person | Pointed form | Reading | Meaning |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1st sg. | עַצְמִי | atsmí | myself |
| 2nd m. sg. | עַצְמְךָ | atsmekhá | yourself |
| 2nd f. sg. | עַצְמֵךְ | atsmékh | yourself |
| 3rd m. sg. | עַצְמוֹ | atsmó | himself, itself |
| 3rd f. sg. | עַצְמָהּ | atsmá | herself, itself |
| 1st pl. | עַצְמֵנוּ | atsménu | ourselves |
| 2nd m. pl. | עַצְמְכֶם | atsmekhém | yourselves |
| 2nd f. pl. | עַצְמְכֶן | atsmekhén | yourselves |
| 3rd m. pl. | עַצְמָם | atsmám | themselves |
| 3rd f. pl. | עַצְמָן | atsmán | themselves |
The form most often misremembered is feminine singular עַצְמֵךְ, with tsere and the reading atsmékh. Agreement is semantic: a woman refers to herself with עצמי because first person has no gender distinction, but someone referring back to a feminine third-person subject must use עצמה, not עצמו.
As a direct object: את עצמי
When the subject acts on itself through an ordinary transitive verb, the reflexive occupies the direct-object slot. Because the suffix identifies a particular possessor, the form is inherently definite. In neutral standard production, a definite direct object takes את: ראיתי את עצמי, הוא שנא את עצמו.
לפעמים אני רואה את עצמי בתמונות ולא מזהה את האיש שמולי.
lif'amím aní ro'é et atsmí batmunót veló mezahé et ha'ísh shemulí
Sometimes I see myself in photos and don't recognise the man looking back at me. (m. speaker)
אחרי הכישלון הוא שנא את עצמו על כל החלטה שקיבל.
akharéi hakishalón hu sané et atsmó al kol hakhlatá shekibél
After the failure he hated himself for every decision he had made.
היא מצאה את עצמה מנהלת צוות בלי שהתכוונה לכך.
hi mats'á et atsmá menahélet tsévet bli shehitkavná lekhákh
She found herself managing a team without having planned to.
The grammar is the same with literal and figurative meanings. גילה את עצמו can be “revealed himself” or “discovered himself”; מצא את עצמו often means “ended up in a situation.” The reflexive still agrees with the subject and remains a definite object.
After a preposition
The same forms can follow whatever preposition the verb or expression requires. Sometimes the preposition is a separate word (עם עצמי); a one-letter prefix is attached (בעצמה, לעצמי).
דיברתי עם עצמי בקול כל הדרך הביתה.
dibárti im atsmí bekól kol hadérekh habáyta
I talked to myself out loud the whole way home.
שמרתי את זה לעצמי עד שהייתי בטוח בעובדות.
shamárti et ze le'atsmí ad shehayíti batúakh ba'uvdót
I kept it to myself until I was sure of the facts. (m. speaker)
היא בטוחה בעצמה גם כשהחדר מלא באנשים מנוסים ממנה.
hi betukhá be'atsmá gam kshehakhéder malé ba'anashím menusím miména
She is confident even when the room is full of people more experienced than she is.
אנחנו צריכים להיות כנים עם עצמנו לפני שנחליט.
anákhnu tsrikhím lihyót kením im atsménu lifnéi shenakhlít
We need to be honest with ourselves before we decide.
In each example the preposition is selected independently: לדבר עם, לשמור ל־, בטוח ב־, כנה עם. The reflexive does not choose the preposition; it merely supplies a complement that refers back to the subject.
The lexical split with hitpa'el
English freely adds myself to a verb: I dressed myself, shaved myself, washed myself. Hebrew usually packages those familiar bodily routines inside the verb itself:
| Normal Hebrew verb | Meaning | Why no עצמי follows |
|---|---|---|
| הִתְלַבַּשְׁתִּי | I got dressed | the affected person is already the subject |
| הִתְגַּלַּחְתִּי | I shaved | hitpa'el already carries the reflexive relation |
| הִתְרַחַצְתִּי | I washed / bathed | the verb is intransitive in this use |
התלבשתי מהר ויצאתי לפני שהילדים התעוררו.
hitlabáshti mahér veyatsáti lifnéi shehayeladím hit'orerú
I got dressed quickly and left before the children woke up.
הוא התגלח בפעם הראשונה לקראת ראיון העבודה.
hu hitgaléakh bapá'am harishoná likrát re'ayón ha'avodá
He shaved for the first time before the job interview.
The analytic reflexive is required with other verbs: שנא את עצמו hate himself, הרג את עצמו kill himself, גילה את עצמו reveal/discover himself, מצא את עצמו find himself. There is no productive calculation that tells you which strategy a new verb will use. The division is lexical and must be learned verb by verb; the wider map belongs on reflexive strategies.
בעצמי as “myself, personally”
There is a second use that looks identical but performs a different job. בעצמי, בעצמך, בעצמו can emphasize the agent: I did it myself, you should check it yourself. It is not the object of the verb; it says that nobody else performed the action.
הרכבתי את הארון בעצמי, ולכן הדלת קצת עקומה.
hirkávti et ha'arón be'atsmí, velakhén hadélet ktsat akumá
I assembled the cupboard myself, which is why the door is slightly crooked.
את יכולה לבדוק את הנתונים בעצמך לפני הישיבה.
at yekholá livdók et hanetuním be'atsmékh lifnéi hayeshivá
You can check the figures yourself before the meeting. (to a woman)
Common Mistakes
1. Adding את עצמי to a verb that is already reflexive. This directly copies English dress myself.
❌ התלבשתי את עצמי לפני שיצאתי
Incorrect — התלבשתי already means ‘I got dressed’ and has no object slot. Say התלבשתי לפני שיצאתי.
✅ התלבשתי לפני שיצאתי, אבל שכחתי לקחת מעיל.
hitlabáshti lifnéi sheyatsáti, avál shakhákhti lakákhat me'íl
I got dressed before I left, but I forgot to take a coat.
2. Letting the suffix disagree with its antecedent. The referent, not the nearest noun, controls the form.
❌ היא כועסת על עצמו בגלל הטעות
Incorrect — the subject is feminine, so the reflexive must be על עצמה.
✅ היא כועסת על עצמה בגלל הטעות, אף שאיש לא האשים אותה.
hi ko'éset al atsmá biglál hata'út, af she'ísh lo he'eshím otá
She is angry with herself over the mistake, although nobody blamed her.
3. Adding את after another preposition. The reflexive is definite, but את only marks a direct object; it does not follow עם.
❌ דיברתי עם את עצמי בדרך הביתה
Incorrect — עם already supplies the verb's preposition. Say דיברתי עם עצמי בדרך הביתה, with no את.
✅ דיברתי עם עצמי בדרך הביתה כדי לעשות סדר במחשבות.
dibárti im atsmí badérekh habáyta kdei la'asót séder bamakhshavót
I talked to myself on the way home to sort out my thoughts.
4. Using the object form for emphatic “by myself.” Agent emphasis requires ב־.
❌ תיקנתי את המזגן את עצמי
Incorrect — את עצמי would be another direct object. ‘I fixed it myself’ requires בעצמי.
✅ תיקנתי את המזגן בעצמי וחסכתי את מחיר הביקור.
tikánti et hamazgán be'atsmí vekhasákhti et mekhír habikúr
I fixed the air conditioner myself and saved the call-out fee.
Key Takeaways
- The complete paradigm is built from עצם + possessive suffix; feminine singular “yourself” is עַצְמֵךְ atsmékh.
- In neutral standard Hebrew, a reflexive direct object is definite and therefore takes את: ראיתי את עצמי, היא שנאה את עצמה. Omission occurs in less formal registers.
- After a preposition, choose the preposition independently: עם עצמי, לעצמי, בעצמה, על עצמם.
- Hebrew often encodes reflexivity inside hitpa'el: התלבשתי, התגלחתי, התרחצתי. Adding את עצמי to these leaves no syntactic slot for the pronoun.
- Other verbs require the separate form: שנא את עצמו, גילה את עצמו, מצא את עצמו. The split is lexical, not predictable.
- בעצמי can instead emphasize the agent — “I did it myself.” That use is not a reflexive object.
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Start learning Hebrew →Related Topics
- Reflexives: התפעל vs את עצמיB2 — Hebrew divides reflexive meaning between lexical hitpa'el verbs such as התלבש and analytic complements such as את עצמי, בעצמו and לעצמה.
- True Reflexives: התלבש, התרחץ, הסתרקB1 — Every hitpa'el reflexive has a transitive twin — and the twin is almost never in the binyan you would guess: התלבש sits beside pa'al לבש, התגלח beside pi'el גילח, התכונן beside hif'il הכין. Learn the pair, because the moment you name what was dressed, washed or shaved you have to switch to the other verb.
- Bound Possessive Suffixes on NounsB1 — Hebrew's third possessive glues the pronoun straight onto the noun — דירתי, ספריי, מכתבו — building on the construct stem rather than the dictionary form. What matters at this level is what the suffixed noun then does in a sentence: it is definite without an article, it drags את in front of it, its adjective takes a ה of its own, and it refuses a further של.
- Emphatic and Contrastive PronounsB2 — Hebrew emphasizes a participant by restoring an otherwise droppable pronoun, contrasting it with another participant, or placing focus particles directly beside it.